Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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It is considered by some that being a university graduate is the key to securing a good
job
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,
while
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there are others who think that it is better to have
experience
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and soft
skills
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. In my opinion, I believe that having
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
education
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is essential for academic jobs
while
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soft
skills
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and
experience
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are more useful in business. On the one hand, many think it is easier for most people to find a good
job
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if they are university graduates with a good degree.
In other words
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, having tertiary
education
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puts people one step ahead of others who do not and
this
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can be the deciding factor in getting a good
job
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. The competition to get
in to
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into
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universities and the increasing number of graduates show just how significant
this
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level of
education
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is for people’s future
work
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opportunities.
On the other hand
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, having
work
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experience
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and soft
skills
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,
such
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as leadership
skills
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and other interpersonal
skills
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, can
also
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throw the balance in favour of the applicant,
according to
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some. For many positions there are an overwhelming number of applicants and,
therefore
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, it is often thought that having relevant
experience
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in that line of
work
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or having acquired useful soft
skills
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that can be valuable to a company, can put one ahead of the game when applying for a
position
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.
Finally
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, in my opinion, whether
needing
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you need
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high
Correct article usage
a high
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level
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education
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of education
show examples
or
skills
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and
experience
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, depends on the
position
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being applied for. Take
for example
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law, medicine or teaching, it is impossible to be considered for a
position
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without the required educational background.
In contrast
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, in business, it would be more important for a candidate to have soft
skills
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and
experience
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in that line of business so they can step into a
position
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without
further
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training and be of immediate benefit to the company. In conclusion, getting a good
job
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requires a relevant background either in
experience
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or
education
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depending on the type of
work
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and field. People should make sure they attain the necessary
skills
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or degrees before applying for a
job
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in order to be sure of success.
Submitted by me_ranger13 on

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Task Achievement
The essay provides a thorough discussion of both sides of the argument, displaying a clear understanding of the task at hand. However, providing one or two more real-world examples could further enhance your argument and provide more concrete evidence to support your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure and organization of the essay are very strong, with a clear progression of ideas throughout the piece. You have introduced the topic, provided a balanced discussion, and then concluded by summarising the main points and presenting your own view. However, make sure you explicitly link your paragraphs - using clearer signposting language could help to guide the examiner through your argument and increase readability.
Lexical Resource
You display a wide vocabulary and an aptitude for using a variety of sentence structures. However, make sure you maintain this level of sophistication in your language use throughout the entire essay.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
An impressive range of grammatical structures is used, and the vast majority are error-free. However, take care not to overuse certain phrases, as this could make your writing seem less varied and interesting.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • theoretical knowledge
  • specialized training
  • networking
  • baseline requirement
  • financial burden
  • hands-on experience
  • practical skills
  • soft skills
  • dynamic job market
  • entrepreneur
  • formal education
  • portfolio
  • hybrid approach
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