Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Other argue that teenagers shouldn’t sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is important to consider how teens spend their

time

Use synonyms

, for they are responsible for the development of the nation. While some people contend that teenagers should utilize their

time

Use synonyms

in part-

time

Use synonyms

jobs, others deem that it is trivial. I completely agree with the former argument, and in

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument. On the one hand, those who believe students should not involve in part-

time

Use synonyms

works argue that jobs may interrupt their

study

Suggestion

studies

This

Linking Words

is because students, who squander their

time

Use synonyms

works

Suggestion

the works

, are usually devoid of

time

Use synonyms

for their studies;

also

Linking Words

, they tend to be more money minded.

For example

Linking Words

, part-

time

Use synonyms

jobs often intrigue teenager to earn money at the cost of knowledge, which they could have garnered in their free

time

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, if students do not engage in part

time

Use synonyms

works, they may have sufficient

time

Use synonyms

to scour through books and ideas.

This

Linking Words

happens because they could give 100 percent in their studies.

However

Linking Words

, I argue that teenagers must

work

Use synonyms

, for they might be financially independent. The reason for

this

Linking Words

is they could earn money in exchange of their

time

Use synonyms

and skills;

for example

Linking Words

, jobs often pay them on an hourly or monthly

basic

a relation that provides the foundation for something

basis

in salary and wage.

In addition

Linking Words

, they would learn the rope while working as an employee in the organization; they may

also

Linking Words

start their own venture utilizing ideas. To illustrate, a person working as an intern or assistant

counselor

someone who gives advice about problems

counsellor

may start their own consulting business. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

there are disadvantages of part

time

Use synonyms

work

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as the interruption of

work

Use synonyms

study

Suggestion

the study

studies

, these must be weighed against the

financially

Suggestion

financial

independence and

erection

Suggestion

the erection

of a business venture it brings. Personally, I think its merits outweigh the drawback, and I would prefer to

work

Use synonyms

part

time

Use synonyms

uttam.bohara0

Apr 26, 2019

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Part-time job
Financial literacy
Work ethic
Discipline
Job market
Academic performance
Extracurricular activities
Labor laws
Work-life balance
Skill development
Monetary independence
Career prospects
Time management
Peer pressure
Rest and recreation
Minimum wage
Skillset enhancement
Self-sufficiency
Personal growth
Adolescent development

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