Many students are taught to push themselves to try and be better than other students, rather than work together for everyone’s benefits. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

It is true that a lot of students are trained to push themselves and compete
to
Suggestion
with
their classmates
instead
of studying in a
group
for mutual benefits. While I acknowledge that there are some advantages of competition, I believe that the drawbacks do outweigh the benefits. On the one hand, there are some benefits of competitiveness that are considered as an efficient way to achieve
goal
Suggestion
the goal
a goal
goals
. The primary benefit is that children will become more mature, independent and dedicated. Competing with others forces students to obtain
high score
Suggestion
a high score
high scores
in
class
Suggestion
the class
,
thus
, they have to equip themselves with a reservoir of knowledge by self-study and searching more materials. Another benefit is competition enable students to have enough
skills to run in
Suggestion
skills to run
a
harsh
solid-hoofed herbivorous quadruped domesticated since prehistoric times
horse
race in the future.
Therefore
, when they are employed, it is possible for them to climb
career ladder
Suggestion
the career ladder
and
fulfill
put in effect
fulfil
ambition of success.
On the other hand
, it seems to me that
group
study is the best choice for student progress.
Firstly
, in a
group
with mixed-ability students, advanced students can experience the satisfaction of helping less-able learners and modelling more complex ideas.
This
practice not only builds confidence in the advanced students but
also
helps weak students move forward and have more intriguing learning methods.
Secondly
, collaboration requires students to have teamwork and communication skills, which are
practical necessity
Suggestion
a practical necessity
practical necessities
in their future. By these skills, it is easy for students to get along with their counterpart in their jobs and foster the relationship bond. In conclusion, while competition promotes
self-study ability
Suggestion
the self - study ability
of children, I believe that studying in a
group
should be applied for a majority of students.
Submitted by Thanh on

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next: