The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008
In
this
era, evidence shows schools allow children
who are under 7 years of age
to begin
their formal education
. It appears that some people argue that this
phenomenon should not be happening. This
essay attempts to shed light on both arguments of this
tendency.
First and foremost, sending children
to school
at an early age
can be advantageous to some extent. In some regions, school
starts to allow young students to get a formal education
to begin
their education
journey at an early age
. It's believed that the early age
of education
can merit the growth of intelligence more easily rather than at a late age
. For example
, the Citra Bangsa School
which is located in Jakarta, accept students without any age
limit requirement and children
under 7 years old can begin their education
at school
.
On the other hand
, there is a possibility that formal school
can negatively affect children
's mental, especially in
a very early Change preposition
at
age
, considering their level of maturity and intelligence. Formal education
requires students to study under many factors of pressure. For instance
, there was a case that children
at a young age
had depression because of the pressure from studying at school
. Parents should consider the level of maturity and intelligence of their children
before sending them to get a formal education
to prevent them from depression. I also
believe that this
approach should be well acknowledged by parents in society to reduce the amount of the same cases might
appear in the future.
In conclusion, Correct pronoun usage
that might
while
it is irrefutable that the ubiquity of formal education
at an early age
to some extent, I believe that children
under 7 years of age
should not get a formal education
at school
.Submitted by muhammad.alfarasyi on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "to begin".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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