Violence in media promotes violence in society. To what extend do you agree?

Media has great impact on the society in recent days. The violences broadcast in media

boost

Suggestion

boosts

the

cruleity

a cruel act; a deliberate infliction of pain and suffering

cruelty

in society. In my opinion the brutality of people is increasing due to promotion of crimes in

media

Suggestion

the media

Firstly

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, the teenagers

are commiting

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is committing

are committing

are commuting

are commenting

more heinous crimes because of their interest in playing horror and most thrilling games and these games are promoted by social media to increase the selling ratio irrespective of their violent nature

Accept space

For an example, the most promoted popular horror game is "blue whale challenge " where the player has to accept the task in step by step process starting by performing criminal task end till killing himself or others.

Secondly

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, the young generation spends time watching cartoons,

you tube

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YouTube

youtube

videos or movie more than 4-5 hours in their daily routine and most of these entertainments have physical violence and lead them to think that it is a normal thing to commit crimes.

This

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can be illustrated by increasing no of incidents

such

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as physical abuse

Suggestion

school student

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a school student

. Recently a case was reported in Mumbai school, a sixth standard student was killed by his senior for not sharing seats in school bus.

In addition

Linking Words

Accept space

the

terrorists

Suggestion

terrorist

activities

are recently advancing

Suggestion

have recently advanced

with the help of

internet especially

Suggestion

the internet, especially

the internet especially

instant access of videos of making advanced bombs as well as recruiting freshers and training providing through video calls.They promote communal riots by floating more videos of slaughtering people based on religion in social media and create unrest among other people by dividing among religion

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For an instance, ISIS group recruiting many Muslim people from India with the help of mass killing videos by the name of religion published through social media like Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

However

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, there are many useful and vast advance information available in

media especially

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the media, especially

the media especially

internet including development

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the internet including development

of recent technologies and help us to learn and update in

time fractions

Accept comma addition

time, fractions

but there are no restrictions on availing these contents even if they contain violent feature. In conclusion, by considering the fact of increasing

crimical

someone who has committed a crime or has been legally convicted of a crime

criminal

critical

activities by young people and

terrorists

Suggestion

terrorist

activities in recent days, the violence in society

are

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more spreading and advancing with help of atrocities broadcasting through

medias

Suggestion

the media

media

models

mediums

only.

meethu.r20

May 11, 2019

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

366 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Desensitization
Aggressive behavior
Imitation
Media regulation
Cultural context
Exposure
Social influence
Violent imagery
Psychological impact
Norms and values
Media consumption
Sensationalism

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Violence in media promotes violence in society. To what extend do you agree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people dislike changes in their society and in their own lives, and want things to stay the same. Why do some people want things to stay the same? Why should change be regarded as something positive?

In recent years many local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres to do their shopping. Is it a positive or negative development?

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?