Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say that this is a positive trend, while others argue that it is leading to negative consequences. Discuss both sides of this argument and then give your own opinion.

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There is an
ever increasing
Add a hyphen
ever-increasing
show examples
use of
technology
,
such
as tablets and laptops, in the classroom. It is often argued that
this
is a positive development, whilst others disagree and think it will lead to adverse ramifications.
This
essay agrees that an increase in
technology
is beneficial to
students
and teachers.
This
essay will discuss both points of view.
It is clear that
the internet has provided
students
with access to more information than ever before.
Moreover
, learners have the ability to research and learn about any subject at the touch of a button. It is
therefore
agreed that
technology
is a very worthwhile tool for education. Wikipedia is a prime example, where
students
can simply type in any keyword and gain access to in-depth knowledge quickly and easily.
However
, many disagree and feel that
technology
deprives
people
of real human
interaction
. Human
interaction
teaches
people
valuable skills
such
as discourse, debate and empathy. Despite
this
, human
interaction
is still possible through the internet and
this
essay disagrees
technology
should be dismissed
for
this
reason.
For instance
, Skype and Facebook make it possible for
people
to interact in ways that were never before possible. In conclusion,
while
the benefits of
technology
, particularly the internet, allow
students
to tap
in to
Join the words
into
show examples
limitless sources of information, some still feel that
people
should be wary of
this
new phenomenon and not allow it to curb
face to face
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
show examples
interaction
.
However
, as long as we are careful to keep in mind the importance of human
interaction
in education, the educational benefits are clearly positive.
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coherence cohesion
You have presented a clear structure and followed a logical argument in your essay, which makes your points easy to understand. Just keep improving on this aspect to ensure that each point flows smoothly into the next.
coherence cohesion
Both your introduction and conclusion are clear and concise offering a good summary of your argument. However, keep practicing to reinforce your ability to succinctly summarise your points without sacrificing any important details.
coherence cohesion
You effectively supported your main points with relevant examples and clear explanations. Just remember to continue using clear examples when presenting your points to provide enough evidence for your arguments.
task achievement
Your response is quite complete, addressing all elements of the task question with a clear stance on the issue. Try to keep nuancing your ideas in a way that precisely fulfills the task requirements.
task achievement
You communicated your ideas in a clear, comprehensive manner, using suitable structures and examples. You are encouraged to continue refining your proficiency in communicating complex ideas succinctly.
task achievement
Your use of relevant examples to support your ideas is commendable. Continue using specific, well-considered examples in your essays to bolster your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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