Today many children spend a lot of time playing computer games and little time on sports. Why is it? Is it a positive or negative development.

#children #time #computer #games #sports #development

Nowadays, the number of offspring would prefer playing computer games rather than taking part in sports. In my opinion,

this

is a negative development which can lead to lack of concentration, many diseases.

Firstly

this

essay will discuss reasons why numerous children spend much

time

playing electronic games and

litle

Suggestion

less

little

time

on sports.

Secondly

, it will

also

discuss that

this

is a disadvantage trend. There

are

Suggestion

a wide range of reasons why numerous children spend much

time

playing electronic games and

litle

Suggestion

less

little

time

on sports.

Firstly

, parents are occupied with work without

time

to take care of children. In fact, they do not have

time

to talk, share and

also

take their sons or daughters to join outdoor activities.

Secondly

, Internet develops quickly. It has a wide range of different games for children.

Besides

, electronic games have vivid pictures and sounds. So, it is

attractive

Suggestion

attracting

attracted

a huge number of

player

Suggestion

players

. Spending lots of

time

to play games is a negative development.

Firstly

student

Suggestion

the student

will neglect their studies.

This

may lead to the fact that the student's study results can be decreased.

For example

, after school, young people prefer playing games to doing homework.

This

may make them give bad marks.

Secondly

, children can have to suffer from

different type

Suggestion

different types

a different type

of diseases,

such

as: obesity, weakness of eyes and so on because they have not moved for a long

time

. In conclusion, for the above reasons, I believe that spending much

time

playing

Suggestion

play

video games is considered a negative trend.

Submitted by Thanh on Thu May 16 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

250 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today many children spend a lot of time playing computer games and little time on sports. Why is it? Is it a positive or negative development.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some educationalists say that every child should be taught how to play a musical instrument. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

In some countries, many people suffer from health problems due to eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. Do you agree or disagree?