some people believe that not all criminals should be kept in prison, but some of them should be allowed to unpaid work to help the community

Many people feel that not all

criminal

Suggestion

criminals

should be kept in jail, but they believe that if they worked in jobs

with out

in absence of

without

salary they could help the society. And I completely disagree with that.

Linking Words

Firstly if

Accept comma addition

Firstly, if

we let felons

work

Use synonyms

in unpaid jobs they will have nothing to worry about, and as consequence of that they will keep committing crimes and that’s dangerous for the

community

Accept comma addition

community, for

for

Linking Words

example many

Accept comma addition

example, many

Thieves and malefactors came from a poor environment and as result many of them chose to steal and kill

Accept space

moreover

Linking Words

we can’t fix their problem by making them poorer

Accept space

Linking Words

however

Suggestion

However

the concept of letting rebellious people out of cells to

work

Use synonyms

will not be a good solution for the long run. Apart from

that another

Accept comma addition

that, another

we can give the opportunity for jobless people to

work

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of malefactors

Accept space

in the era of development many factories and companies replaced the employees with robots which lead to an unemployment community

Accept space

anyway we can make people

work

Use synonyms

rather than those criminals in

this

Linking Words

order we can build

better future

Suggestion

a better future

better futures

Accept space

Linking Words

for

Suggestion

For

example these

Accept comma addition

example, these

people can

work

Use synonyms

in any job and we can invest their youth in the to make the upcoming situation much

more better

Suggestion

better

Accept space

In conclusion

Accept space

I believe that if we release the criminals to the,

public the

Accept comma addition

public, the

community will suffer from them

Accept space

but alternatively we can use the unemployment people to

work

Use synonyms

in contrast

Linking Words

of the malefactors,

furthermore

Linking Words

felons

has already lost

Suggestion

have already lost

had already lost

everything in life so they have nothing to care about and they are ready

Suggestion

for

committing

another

not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied

other

crimes.

haeder932007

May 24, 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rehabilitation
incarceration
non-violent crimes
overcrowding
reoffending rates
judicial discretion
alternative punishments
public funds
community service
petty theft
vandalism
punitive measures
social reintegration
deterrence
minor offenses

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some people believe that not all criminals should be kept in prison, but some of them should be allowed to unpaid work to help the community

Fully explain your ideas

Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative impact on children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To whtat extent do you agree or disagree?

Excessive traffic has made cities unpleasant places to live and work in. For this reason, private cars should be completely banned from city centres. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Billions of dollars are being wasted each year on space research. The money could be better used to improve conditions on earth. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that using animals to test the safety of human medicines is cruel and unwarranted, whereas others feel it is a medical necessity. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.