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Writing Samples
Band 4

some people think that only way to judge someone's success in business is by the amount of money they make. Is money a true indicator of success of a business? In what other ways could success in a business be measured?

#people #judge #someone #success #business #amount #money #indicator
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It is believed by some people that people's
success
Use synonyms
 in
business
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 is always
measued
having notes of fixed rhythmic value
measured
 in terms of how much
money
Use synonyms
 they earned. In my opinion,
money
Use synonyms
 is the most valuable indicator of
success
Use synonyms
 of a
business
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. There are many ways taken
in to
expresses motion to a point on, or within, something
into
 account to determine the
success
Use synonyms
 of
business
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will delve
in to
expresses motion to a point on, or within, something
into
 these aspects with
relevent
having a bearing on or connection with the subject at issue
relevant
 examples to support my view. To commence with,
money
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 is
cosidered
carefully weighed
considered
 as the
prodominant
most frequent or common
predominant
 factor in deciding the
success
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 of a
business
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.
In other words
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,
company's profit
Suggestion
the company's profit
 and market shares are two key factors which decided the
success
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 of a
business
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 nowadays. To exemplify,
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last
Suggestion
Last
 year economic
india
a republic in the Asian subcontinent in southern Asia; second most populous country in the world; achieved independence from the United Kingdom in 1947
India
 had declared
samsung
(Old Testament) a judge of Israel who performed herculean feats of strength against the Philistines until he was betrayed to them by his mistress Delilah
Samson
Samsung
 as the most successful mobile manufacturer because of the huge turnover
money
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 and elevated market shares. It is
vivdly
in a vivid manner
vividly
 evident that
money
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 is
indispensible and crucial factor
Suggestion
an indispensable and crucial factor
indispensable and crucial factor
 while deciding the
success
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. There are other factors which is directly
propotional
properly related in size or degree or other measurable characteristics; usually followed by 'to'
proportional
proportionate
 to
success
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.
Firstly
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, the total size of employees working in an organization. If
organization
Suggestion
an organization
 runs
successfully
Accept comma addition
successfully, then
then
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 it would hire more employees and
increade
become bigger or greater in amount
increase
 their benefits.
Secondly
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, the
colleaboration
act of working jointly
collaboration
collaborations
 with overseas clients and other company's
also
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 an
imporatant
of great significance or value
important
 point to measure the
success
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. To elucidate, a
successfull
having succeeded or being marked by a favorable outcome
successful
 organization might have more
contacts
Suggestion
contact
 with clients and
company's
Suggestion
the company's
 due to its
successfull
having succeeded or being marked by a favorable outcome
successful
business
Use synonyms
 and quality of the product.
Thus
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,
success
Use synonyms
 is a combination of all these factors components
.
Accept space
.
 In conclusion,
although
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money
Use synonyms
 is the effective way to measure the
success
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 of
business
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, there are many other methods to tackle the
success
Use synonyms
.
Organization
Suggestion
An organization
The organization
 has to maintain all the discussed factors to attain
success
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by lijiac020 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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