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Band 4.5

The government should allocate more funding to teaching sciences rather than other subjects in order for a country to develop and progress. To what extend do you agree?

#government #sciences #subjects #country #progress
Education
 is an important sector in each
country
 all over the world. Some people believe that the
government
 should prioritise the funding allocation towards
sciences
Suggestion
science
education
instead
 of any other kind of
education
 for a
country
 to be able to grow and evolve.
This
 essay will explain the reason why it is true and give some supporting facts and opinions related to it. I believe that it is important for the
government
 to focus on
science
-related allocation compared to other subjects,
for instance
 music, sport, and art. The question is: why is it important for the
government
 to outweigh the spending on it? The main reason is the number of scientists in the world is getting decrease year by
year while
Accept comma addition
year, while
 the
country
 need of their existence is getting
increase
Suggestion
increases
. Nowadays, there is a shifting of current generation’s interest regarding what is the most interesting and important to them at the same
time so
Accept comma addition
time, so
 that becoming a scientist is not
favorable
encouraging or approving or pleasing
favourable
 anymore compared to in the past decades. It is because to become a trusted scientist, they need to
purse
carry out or participate in an activity; be involved in
pursue
 higher
education
, at least owning a
master
Suggestion
master's
 degree. They need to invest more time and money in pursuing higher
education
,
in
contrast most
Accept comma addition
contrast, most
 of them get
lower salary
Suggestion
a lower salary
lower salaries
 than expected after finishing master or PhD.
However
, in my opinion, if the
science
education
 is totally free, the interest of pursuing higher
education
 in
science
 will increase.
Moreover
, if the infrastructure of learning
science
 had been well-built, the students would have been attracted to learn
science
 than other subjects. To sum up, it is important for the
government
 to outweigh their focus on allocating their funding to teaching sciences rather than other subjects by giving grants and scholarship both to teachers and students because without scientist, the
country
 will not be able to develop and progress properly.
Submitted by mega.watty1994 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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