Most people believe that stricter punishment should be given for traffic offences. To what extent do you agree?

There is a hot debate over whether stricter

punishment

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should be given for breaking

traffic

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rules or not. In my opinion, harsh

punishment

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is not the solution in all the cases, it varies from

case

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case

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, as severity of

traffic

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offence

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and age of the

driver

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should be considered before deciding the

punishment

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Linking Words

First point

Suggestion

The first point

to consider here is the kind of

traffic

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offence

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, if it is life threatening

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offence

Suggestion

offensively

hit

Suggestion

a hit

and run, and drunk and drive,

then

Linking Words

in that

case

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punishment

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like imprisonment with or without heavy fine is necessary. When they know the consequences of their careless actions, they would be more careful and serious while driving on

road

Suggestion

the road

Secondly

Linking Words

, if the

traffic

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offence

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is minor and does not have potential impact on anyone

else

Accept comma addition

else, then

then

Linking Words

a warning to

first

Linking Words

timers and

appropriate fine

Suggestion

appropriate fines

an appropriate fine

on multiple occurrence should be given.

For instance

Linking Words

, if rules like speeding, not wearing seatbelt and parking in no parking zone

are broken

Suggestion

is broken, then

is broken then

then

Linking Words

ticket with a fine should be charged.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, if the same incident happens again and

again

Accept comma addition

again, then

then

Linking Words

driving license

driver

Use synonyms

should be revoked for a week or so.

This

Linking Words

would result in decrease in

such

Linking Words

incidents.

In addition

Linking Words

to the above two points, the other major thing to consider is the age of the

driver

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. If

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driver

Suggestion

the driver

a driver

is young or teenage

then

Linking Words

the government should make a rule of attending Defensive Driving Classes mandatory, which will help the young drivers to learn about the importance of adhering to

traffic

Use synonyms

rules on

road

Suggestion

the road

For example

Linking Words

, young people are more addictive to phone, they do text and call while driving more often. These classes will teach them about the consequence of all

such

Linking Words

activities and help them in becoming

good

Suggestion

a good driver

driver

Use synonyms

. From what

have been discussed

Suggestion

has been discussed

above points

Suggestion

the above points

, in conclusion, having stricter

punishment

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for all

traffic

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offences is not necessary. Each

case

Use synonyms

should be treated differently based upon the kind of incident and age of

driver

Use synonyms

bhattmaneesh

Jun 10, 2019

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

327 words

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Most people believe that stricter punishment should be given for traffic offences. To what extent do you agree?

2. More and more people are working from home rather than at the workplace. Some people say this will bring benefits to the workers and their families, but others think it will bring stress to the home. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Mojor cities in the world are growing fast, as wall as their problems. what are the problems that young people living in those citiesare focusing? Saggest some solution.

for many people, the reason they work hard is to earn money. to what extent do you agree or disagree? edit

Today, many people use the internet and smartphones to transfer money to friends, family, and businesses. Is this a positive or negative development?

‏Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free times. This can benefit teenagers and benefit the community as well. ‏To what extend do you agree or disagree.