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Band 6

These days many children spend a lot of their time playing computer games but little time doing sports? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#children #time #computer #games #sports #development
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Although
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, it is sometimes thought that playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games by sitting in the room make young ones lazy as well as slows down the growth, while other parents find
this
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 is an opportunity to
becoming
Suggestion
become
 expert in
computer
Use synonyms
 skills. I believe
this
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 is a negative development, as apart from skills of learning, youngsters actually lagging behind in so many things. Proponents of its positive development, regarding
computer
Use synonyms
 games, these games
has improved
Suggestion
have improved
 child's understanding of
computer
Use synonyms
 softwares. Prior to these facilities, persons had lack technical skills.
However
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, due to
computer
Use synonyms
 games, students now have developed
interest
Suggestion
an interest
 in
computer
Use synonyms
 learning
also
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 which ultimately benefits them for long.
Furtgermore
in addition
Furthermore
, nowadays, they are using any softwares like an expert.
For example
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, one of my cousins, have learned elementary skills by using phone games, no one has
teached
impart skills or knowledge to
taught
touched
reached
 her.
On the other hand
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,
variety
Suggestion
a variety
 of
computer
Use synonyms
 games enticed the
youngsters
Suggestion
youngster's
 mind
fastly
with rapid movements
quickly
.
In other words
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, myriad of games
make
Suggestion
makes
young ones
Suggestion
the young ones
 greedy to play for more.
Hence
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,
this
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 habit, avert the situation to go out and play other sport on the field. They find them more interesting,
that is
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 why, they are avoiding it. Despite, its positive influence, it
destroy
Suggestion
destroys
 their health condition in terms of physical,
mentally
Suggestion
mental
 because playing outdoor game demands
physical existence
Suggestion
the physical existence
 of a person. Apart from exercise, sports are
also
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 beneficial for
student concise
Accept comma addition
student, concise
 development and mental growth ability, by it they can become more creative. In
conclusion, despite of
Suggestion
conclusion, despite
 some positive aspects,
computer
Use synonyms
 game negative influences outweigh because, to
secure future
Suggestion
a secure future
,
its
it is
it's
 not a good idea to ruin their present condition. To make them compatible with
world
Suggestion
the world
, social going out skills are necessary not only for living but to make a difference.
Submitted by pandey.sunaina15 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • allure
  • captivate
  • supervise
  • accessible
  • scarcity
  • safer alternative
  • peer pressure
  • educational tools
  • cognitive skills
  • implications
  • obesity
  • poor posture
  • hand-eye coordination
  • problem-solving abilities
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