These days mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#phones #internet #people #outweigh

this

contemporary era, technology is progressing at an exponential pace. Mobile phones and

internet

Suggestion

the internet

are

become

Suggestion

becoming

the need of every person to interact with the community.

This

electronic advancement has affected relationships in various ways. In my perspective, the drawbacks certainly seem to be exiguous as compared to

benefits

Suggestion

the benefits

. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will elucidate my viewpoint with relevant examples. The drawback associated with

this

is that, it hinders real human interactions.

For instance

, it has been observed, people even at public places remain glued to their gadgets.

Instead

of interacting with the people around them, they ignore face to face conversation for virtual ones.

As a

result people

Accept comma addition

result, people

are nowadays struggling to chat with someone they meet out in public. Since humans are social creatures by nature who need real life connections,

this

runs the risk of becoming a huge problem for the society. On the flip side, Smart devices and

internet

Suggestion

the internet

also

comes with significant advantages.

First

and foremost, technical development has increased the efficiency of communication.

For example

, hundreds years ago, it was arduous to contact with a person living in

other

any of various alternatives; some other

another

part of world while today we have numerous instant communication channels like,

skype

Suggestion

Skype

, and many more with which we can convey any information with a click of the button.

Secondly

, smart phones are a multipurpose device having entertainment, photo, video-capturing, and games which

Suggestion

are

way too beneficial for individuals. In the nutshell, I would like to pen down by saying that mobiles and internet do come with certain

problems but

Accept comma addition

problems, but

in my

opinion if

Accept comma addition

opinion, if

it use

Accept comma addition

it, use

it wisely and appropriately it has myriad advantages for individuals and society.

Submitted by kavalkaur03 on Wed Jun 19 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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These days mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are the solutions?

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and more creativity than reading. To what extent do you agree? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

Some people feel that learning a foreign languageis an essential component of a child's education. Others feel that learning a foreign language is often a waste of time that can be better spent on learning technologyand other vocational subjects. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays more and more museums and art galleries around the world are putting their material contents online. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?