Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both views and give your opinion

There is a difference of opinion on how unpleasant situations should be handled. While a number of individuals argue that accepting a negative circumstance is better, I am of the viewpoint that trying to change
such
circumstance is more beneficial than accepting the situation. Those who support the view that bad incidences should be accepted argue on the basis of religious belief.
This
is because they claim that
majority
Suggestion
the majority
of
such
happens
as a result
of the influence of a higher being. They argue that
such
states should be accepted as
this
prepares us for better events. A man who believes in a supreme being and recently lost his
job
,
for instance
, would rather than search for a
job
claim everything happens for a
reason because
Accept comma addition
reason, because
he believes a higher power would eventually provide a
job
when the time is right.
However
, I would argue that some events
such
as lack of finance, unsatisfactory
job
, or toxic relationships should be improved for one’s mental state.
This
implies that an unpleasant event of
situation
Suggestion
a situation
the situation
happening in one’s life has serious implications on their mental health leading to increase
rate
Suggestion
the rate
of
depression
and psychosis. Take
for example
, a research carried out by the World Health Organization, in 2018 revealed that about 75% of patients with
depression
had some sort
of negative event
Suggestion
of a negative event
happening in their lives at the time they experienced
depression
.
However
,
this
figure was said to have reduced significantly immediately after
such
situations were changed.
Hence
, if most situations are tackled
with determination
Suggestion
with this determination
this
would lead to the decrease rate of
depression
, which in turn leads to decrease in
sucidal
the act of killing yourself
suicide
rates. In conclusion, while a lot of people tend to argue that unpleasant states should be accepted as
this
is from a higher source, I believe that most negative circumstances should be changed as
this
improves mental health and decreases
sucidal
the act of killing yourself
suicide
suicidal
rates within the community.
Submitted by hgdfg on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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