Some young people believe it’s best to move out of their hometowns when they become adults, while others wish to live in their hometowns their whole lives. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #it’s #move #hometowns #adults #lives

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After turning into an adult, the young folk gets the option either to leave their comfort zone or to stay put in their same old town. In my opinion, rather than staying in the

hometown

Use synonyms

, it is always better to leave the town for better career and opportunities. On one hand, when a person gets out of his city and moves into a mega city, he faces numerous challenges and pitfalls for the

first

Linking Words

time,

such

Linking Words

as taking the decisions on his own hand.

Life

Use synonyms

without family can become quite cumbersome, and

this

Linking Words

new challenging situation of

life

Use synonyms

teaches the best lessons to become strong and mature.

For instance

Linking Words

, when I stepped out of my home, I faced

wtih

expresses the means used

with

huge difficulties in a new vicinity, but those

hursh

unpleasantly stern

harsh

conditions made me a more adaptable, flexible and a successful person.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, these new conditions develop the can do attitude, which is very important for anyone to become more confident. And being confident is the key to

Suggestion

being

successful. Without

positive attitude

Suggestion

a positive attitude

toward

life

Use synonyms

and confidence it is tough to get any work done in a harsh condition that we live in.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, staying inside the

hometown

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

comes with

lot

Suggestion

a lot

lots

of benefits.

Firstly

Linking Words

, by nurturing ones comfort zone one can take care of his old parents, which is not an easy job when he is outside his

hometown

Use synonyms

Second

Linking Words

, Not leaving the

neighborhood

a surrounding or nearby region

neighbourhood

makes

life

Use synonyms

easy

Suggestion

easier

in many ways, socializing with friends and family, networking with people, serving the community are to name a few.

Finally

Linking Words

, for people whose

life

Use synonyms

is set and have

lot

Suggestion

lots

of property to take care of, leaving their city does not make much sense. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

I do

undrstand

know and comprehend the nature or meaning of

understand

why many people want to live in their

hometown

Use synonyms

forever, I strongly believe for a better career path, and to learn more about the walks of

life

Use synonyms

, the young people should walk out of their comfort zone and accommodate themselves in big cities to become more successful.

Submitted by saminewaz on Tue Jun 25 2019

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

334 words

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Some young people believe it’s best to move out of their hometowns when they become adults, while others wish to live in their hometowns their whole lives. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people with a better education. Agree or disagree.

Nowadays people depends on newspapers,radios,television and the internet for news and information.Which in your opinion is the best way for getting news and why?

Nowadays the trend of eating ready made food is increasing. Do the advantages outweigh its disadvantages.