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Band 6

Some people think that rich countries should support poor countries in terms of aid for health care and education. To what extend do you agree?

#people #countries #support #terms #aid #health #care #education
Provision of assistance by wealthy nations to nations that are not wealthy, in terms of health and education is necessary. Some people and I are of the opinion that rich countries should assist poor countries due to the inherent advantages of doing so.
This
 will be explained
further
. There are many reasons why wretched nations need
assistance
Suggestion
the assistance
 of rich ones, one of
such
 is in the area of health care. Provisions of aids to these nations will help in fighting deadly diseases.
For example
, Ebola
outbreak
 in Nigeria in 2015. Nigeria was able to defeat the diseases with support from countries
such
 as the USA and the UK. The timely intervention of these giant countries helped eradicate Ebola in Nigeria, thereby preventing a deadly
outbreak
 of the diseases which could have killed millions of people in the country. The
outbreak
 could have
also
 spread to other countries including these two big countries as people are always travelling from one part of the world to the other. Another area where rich countries need to support poor countries is in education. Education helps in liberating people and empowering nationalities of these nations.
For example
, it is only when people are educated that they will be able to use new inventions
such
 as telephones, cars, laptops, television e.t.c.
that
Suggestion
That
 are manufactured by
the rich
Suggestion
the richest
nation thereby
Accept comma addition
nation, thereby
 creating new markets for
such
 products.
This
 will
also
 help in improving their economy. In conclusion, I believe that helping poor countries in terms of health and education will help prevent
outbreak
Suggestion
outbreaks
an outbreak
the outbreak
 of deadly diseases and
also
 create more markets for companies of these rich countries.
Submitted by gbokunfullhouseconcepts on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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