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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the changes in gross domestic product (GDP) in Western Cape between 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the changes in gross domestic product (GDP) in Western Cape between 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graph illustrates the percentage variation in
gross
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the gross
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 domestic product (
GDP
Use synonyms
) in the Western Cape over the period of ten years ranging from 2000 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
GDP
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 remained stable with a slight increase between 2003 and 2004 but an abrupt fall can be observed after 2007. That fall continues up to 2009 after which
GDP
Use synonyms
 once again started to rise quickly. From 2000 to 2003, annual
GDP
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 growth remained roughly the same with little fluctuations between 4 and 3.3
percent
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per cent
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. It rose slightly from 3.3% to 5.5% during the duration between 2003 and 2004. After that, it again plateaued for
Linking Words
next
Correct article usage
the next
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 three years and peaked at 6% in 2007. It is
also
Linking Words
 interesting to see that
although
Linking Words
 there are some downfalls in
Use synonyms
GDP
Correct article usage
the GDP
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 growth rate,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
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the
overall
Linking Words
 trend is increasing over the first half of
period
Correct article usage
the period
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 ranging from 2000 to 2007. In 2007, a sudden decline in the percentage can be observed. It drops down from its peak value of 6% to all the way up to -1.5% in just
Linking Words
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 two years. The negative percentage represents the annual reduction in
GDP
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of growth.
Finally
Linking Words
, after hitting the lowest value in history,
GDP
Use synonyms
 in the Western Cape has again started to rise in a quick manner.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "next, overall".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words gdp with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Gross Domestic Product (GDP)
  • Economic indicator
  • Timeframe
  • Trend
  • Fluctuation
  • Sector
  • Contribution
  • Correlation
  • Percentage
  • Increase/decrease
  • Significant
  • Policy
  • Economic crisis
  • Peak
  • Trough
  • Steady
  • Overview
  • Observation
  • Speculate
  • Summarize
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