IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that shops should sell the food products of local markets whenever possible, rather than importing from abroad. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many people believe that outlets should sell the eatables produced by the local markets
instead
Linking Words
 of importing from other parts of the world.
However
Linking Words
, I agree that
such
Linking Words
 a trend will certainly help the economy by reducing
cost
Suggestion
costs
 and providing more
employment
Use synonyms
 opportunities in spite of few drawbacks. People who support the idea of selling eatables of local markets believe that
such
Linking Words
 trend will,
firstly
Linking Words
, help in cutting costs. A lot of taxes and duties need to be paid while importing food products. Selling the products of the local markets help in saving these taxes. Saving in direct and indirect overheads helps in reducing overall cost.
This
Linking Words
 results in wider availability of these products to all income level people. Another advantage is the conservation of foreign
currency which
Accept comma addition
currency, which
otherwise
Linking Words
 has to be paid to pay for the imports.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, marketing local products helps in enhancing
employment
Use synonyms
 opportunities. Markets need to be loaded with a variety of products in order to reduce the reliance on imports.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a variety of food products need to be produced at their own.
Hence
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
the local people get
myraid
Suggestion
a myriad
myriad
the myriad
mired
 of
employment
Use synonyms
 opportunities.
For example
Linking Words
, women can make sweets and snacks at home and supply to local shops
to sell
Suggestion
sell
Linking Words
this products
Suggestion
this product
these products
. Selling localised products has its own drawbacks too.
Firstly
Linking Words
, local products
lack
Suggestion
lacks
 standardisation. People don't buy these products considering
these
plural of that
those
 of inferior quality.
However
Linking Words
,
few rules
Suggestion
a few rules
 and regulations should be made to ensure the quality of these products. To conclude, selling local products help in reducing overall cost and improving
employment
Use synonyms
 opportunities.
Linking Words
However
Accept comma addition
However, such
such
Linking Words
 a trend has few drawbacks, but the benefits far outweigh the disadvantages.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: