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Band 7

Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think that this is fully justified while others think that it is unfair. Discus both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#sports #professionals #money #people #professions #discus
People may vary in their opinions about whether it is highly reasonable for top athletes to be getting paid more than other critical professions. Personally, I strongly support that sports superstars deserve
such
 high incomes. On the one hand, it is unfair for huge earning in
sport
 because some people consider that the amount of money a person makes should be equivalent to the value of service one provides to society.
Nevertheless
, sports stars’ incomes are not
resulted
Suggestion
resulting
 from considering
contribution to society a
Suggestion
a contribution to society as a
a contribution to society a
 person makes or the level of responsibility he or she holds
in contrast
 to other crucial professions
such
 as top surgeons who perform medical operations to save plenty of precious lives, outstanding research scientists who lead our world to a higher degree of technology and life satisfaction, or even leading politicians who take on the accountability of governing the country. Sports stars’ rewards reflect the public popularity of
sport
 in general and the public support that stars can generate,
instead
.
Therefore
,
this
 may not justify
such
 high salaries in
sport
.
On the other hand
, there are various reasons why some people accept huge incomes in
sport
.
Firstly
, a player who would like to reach the highest level in any kinds of
sport
 must be uniquely talented, leading to a tiny percentage of sports stars. It is infrequent to find a player with the tennis skills of Roger Federer,
for instance
.
Hence
, these players deserve incredibly high incomes that reflect their extraordinary abilities.
In addition
, even the most talented sports player has to undergo a large number of years of training to develop the fitness and skills required.
This
 requires great passion, perseverance, commitment and dedication. Competition is
also
 constant and players are tested every time they perform in their relatively short career.
Furthermore
,
as a result
 of intense media pressure given to top sports players, their personal lives get
overexposed which
Accept comma addition
overexposed, which
consequently
 results in
little
Suggestion
less
 privacy out of the spotlight.
As a result
, all of these factors could support the huge earning. In conclusion,
although
 people have different perspectives, I wholeheartedly agree that the amount of money top sports professionals make is highly fair when comparing to other essential professions due to possessing extraordinary ability, being completely dedicated, and suffering from media invasion of the private lives.
Submitted by Serhii Baraniuk on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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