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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The graph shows how employerer free time activity was passed enjoyab

The graph shows how employerer free time activity was passed enjoyab
#employerer #time #activity #enjoyab
The graph shows how
employerer
Correct your spelling
employer
employers
 free
time
 activity was passed
enjoyable
Change the adjective
enjoyably
show examples
 at except
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
work in 1998-99 by sex and
employement
Correct your spelling
employment
 types. A glance at the graph reveals that most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
 could
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 funny
time
 in leisure. As
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the presented diagram shows that employed people
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 is
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
 or part
time
 not
so
Add a missing verb
have so
show examples
 much
time
 as than different
employement
Correct your spelling
employment
employments
 status.
However
,
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
 employed
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 gender had
worst
Correct article usage
the worst
show examples
 leisure
time
. by the way,
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
 female
employerer
Correct your spelling
employees
 passed
time
 over 38 hours,
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
employerer
Correct your spelling
employees
 is 40 too. non-workers had
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
funny
Replace the word
fun
show examples
time
 than other. the possibility is too much leisure
time
 was growth the number of graph
statistic
Fix the agreement mistake
statistics
show examples
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
70 hours.
in contrast
, the
housewiwes
Correct your spelling
housewives
 was
Submitted by wujiyaha on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 88%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words time with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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