In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that governments should levy a tariff on junk
food
because the number of health risks associated with consuming
this
kind of
food
is on the rise.
This
essay agrees that a higher rate of tax should be paid by fast
food
companies.
Firstly
,
this
essay will discuss the fact that alcohol and tobacco companies already pay higher
taxes
and
secondly
, discuss how higher
taxes
would raise prices and lower consumption. Higher excise on liqueur and cigarettes has proven to be successful at curbing the harm caused by these substances.
This
revenue has been used to treat health problems associated with these products and has proven useful in advertising campaigns warning people about the dangers of alcohol and tobacco abuse. Tax from fast
food
could be used in the same way. The United Kingdom is a prime example, where money from smokers is used to treat lung cancer and heart disease. Increasing
taxes
would raise prices and lower consumption. Fast
food
companies would pass on these
taxes
to consumers in the form of higher prices and
this
would lead to people not being able to afford junk
food
because it is too expensive. Junk
food
would soon become a luxury item and it would only be consumed occasionally, which would be less harmful to the general public’s health.
For instance
, the cost of organic
food
has proven prohibitively expensive for most people and
that is
why only a small percentage of the population buy it regularly.
Submitted by rohsengar on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay contains a clear argument with a well-structured progression, including an introduction, developed arguments and a conclusion. Keep the good work up. However, you might want to improve in offering more detailed support for your main points.
task achievement
Your task response was great. You did understand the task, took a clear stance and demonstrated how well you can argue for your opinion. However, you could provide a broader view and further analysis of the situation in your discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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