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Band 6

People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individual and society?

#people #countries #effect #society
An increasing concern for many people around the world is that sleep deprivation. The causes of
this
 phenomenon are varied and have led to a wide range of effects on human life. In
this
 essay, I will outline why sleep deficiency is occurring and discuss the impacts it can have on people. From an overall perspective, one of the main causes of the problem is that cutting-edge technological
advance
Suggestion
advancements
such
 as the high-speed internet, gaming computers, and modern smartphones. These devices are giving people, especially young adults, a lot of fun like surfing websites, playing almost real 3D games, and chatting with friends for many hours, reducing sleep hours considerably.
Secondly
, today the society is becoming more competitive. By
this
 I mean people have become busier than ever before in order to suffer from
this
 competition and live happy and well. The results of sleep deficiency are numerous and potentially serious. Perhaps the most serious consequence is that insomnia. According to the study conducted by the American National Health Center, if one is being lacked sleep for more than two weeks, it will affect his entire body negatively and growing risks to get insomnia. A
second
 consequence is that health problems, especially mental health problems.
For example
, the study showed that
last
 year (by 2018) more than 10 million adolescents addicted to a mobile game named ‘PUBG’ and they had
sleep
Suggestion
slept
 deficiency, which in turn leads to hurt their mental health. To recapitulate, sleep deprivation is an issue which will continue to demand our attention for the foreseeable future, due to the reasons
such
 as technological advances and competitive community.
Submitted by ariuka.jagaa on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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