You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Many people today, especially in the developed world, are choosing to have fewer children, or none at all. Why is this happening, and do you think it is a good trend? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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The worrying trend of decreasing birth rate is observed in many countries,
in particular
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the developed ones. It is possible to identify
causes
Suggestion
the causes
driving
this
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phenomenon, which, I believe, would have a negative impact on those societies. The change in people’s mentality has influenced the
choince
the person or thing chosen or selected
choice
chance
of the number of
children many
Accept comma addition
children, many
couples would like to have. Certainly, most western societies are the consumerist ones. What
this
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means is that
peaople
(plural) any group of human beings (men or women or children) collectively
people
feel they must have the most recent
gagets
a device or control that is very useful for a particular job
gadgets
graduates
or other pieces of technology.
As a
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result many
Accept comma addition
result, many
choose to concentrate on their careers, so that they could earn more,
instead
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of looking after children.
Besides
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, every child is a noticeable
finantial
involving financial matters
financial
cost to the parents, as the need to provide them with food, clothing and education.
Therefore
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, it is becoming more common that young adults decide to live with all the comforts the world can provide
instead
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of having many children.
Although
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this
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situation presents the benefit of wealthy living while being young, it might have detrimental consequences for the future.
Firstly
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, the economic impact; smaller numbers of working age residents will result in
lower amount
Suggestion
a lower amount
of taxes paid.
This
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, in turn, would mean lower pensions for the retired.
Secondly
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, medical developments contribute to increasing human life span.
This
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in addition
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to already mentioned decreasing numbers of those working might create a serious problem with healthcare provision. If there are not enough candidates to fill in the vacancies in hospitals and care homes, the elderly will experience
low
Suggestion
lower
quality of care.
Hence
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, in the long run declining birth rates could have
negative impact
Suggestion
a negative impact
on the society. In conclusion, many couples decide to have less than two children so they can enjoy life. In my firm opinion,
this
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phenomenon would be detrimental for the future of many societies.
Submitted by marta.a.zelewska on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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