Some people think that children should go to kindergarten before attending Primary School while other believe that it is better for children to stay all day with family. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Child care
Suggestion
Childcare
and parenting has become a matter of great concern over time. The increased trend of sending adolescence to Kindergarten prior to formal education has given rise to heated debate about if a
child
kept in
playschool
develops better or it is better for
young one's
Suggestion
a young one's
the young one's
to stay completely with family before going for formal schooling. Both views are discussed in
ensuing paragraphs
Suggestion
the ensuing paragraphs
before reaching to a valid conclusion. Kindergarten
are believed
Suggestion
is believed
to be beneficial as they
helps
Suggestion
help
adolescence in developing as an extrovert and confident individuals which helps them at every stage of life. A survey why International
child
development authority reveals that children who had been enrolled for play schools by their parents are more friendly and confident interacting with outsiders and are
considerablly
to a great extent or degree
considerably
more alert and attentive.
In contrast
, growing entirely in closed family environment less friendly and possess
underconfidence
.
Hence
, School boosts personality of children at
very young age
Suggestion
a very young age
.
Accept space
.
However
, who completely rely on Kindergartens might sometime
ends
Suggestion
end
up risking
psychological development
Suggestion
the psychological development
of their offsprings
.
Accept space
.
As a
child
's is very sensitive
,
Accept space
,
as
such
any negative experience main cause lifelong damage to the personality of young ones. Delhi
,
Accept space
,
for instance
, reported many instances where School children are being threatened turn up badly by the faculty members. Owing to
such
incidences, Aashiq your family environment is considered batch suitable for adolescents. As families
not only take
Suggestion
doesn't only take
care of proper food habits of
children but
Accept comma addition
children, but
also
prevent them from bad experiences affecting their mental growth as a
child
.
Accept space
.
In my opinion, our family environment
provide
Suggestion
provides
old habitation to
children but
Accept comma addition
children, but
a
child
is kept segregated family will difficult to interact with people outside
family
Suggestion
the family
and develops as introvert individual.
Hence
, in order to enable a
child
to learn developing socially and mentally at young age Play Schools are good alternatives.
How ever
Suggestion
However
, parents must keep vigilant watch over the daily routine activities of Play Schools and any change in
child's behaviour
Suggestion
the child's behaviour
must be
careful
Suggestion
carefully
observed in order to enable the
child
develop
Suggestion
to develop
as healthy individual
Suggestion
as a healthy individual
.
Submitted by naresh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: