IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #leisure #time #activities #mind #word #puzzles #rest
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Nowadays people get some
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 in their life to do something which they have
interest
Suggestion
an interest
 or do some
rest
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. Some humans think that it is important for everyone to
use
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 their
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 in
some
one or some or every or all without specification
any
activity
Use synonyms
 which improve the mental
ability
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, but other feels that people should do proper
rest
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 in their
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
. According to my viewpoint people do some other
activity
Use synonyms
 which
improve
Suggestion
improves
 their mental
ability
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is true that everyone need
leisure
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time
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 in their life. It is important to
use
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leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 in the other
activity
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 to improve mental
ability
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.
For example
Linking Words
, children go to school for study purpose, but after getting back to school they spend their
leisure
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time
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 in playing some sports which
is
Suggestion
are
 very beneficial for their health and
mind
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some people who working in an organisation have a stressful
work
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 in their company, so they should play some
puzzles
Suggestion
puzzle
 game in their
leisure
Use synonyms
time
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 because its very helpful to overcome stress and relax
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mind
Suggestion
the mind
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there are some dwellers think that it is more important to
rest
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 their
mind
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in
Suggestion
at
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 because there are some physical
work
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 who tired people.
For example
Linking Words
, a mad who
work
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 from the early morning and feel tired
in
Suggestion
at
 the end of the day, so it is very important to
rest
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 their
mind
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some other
mind
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work
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 like
scientist
Suggestion
a scientist
scientists
 who do lots of research and
use
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 their
mind
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, so it is very important to relax their
mind
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 and
use
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 them later. To conclude, it is true that
rest
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 their
mind
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in
Suggestion
at
leisure
Use synonyms
time
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 is very important, but according to my
view point
a mental position from which things are viewed
viewpoint
 do some other mental
activity
Use synonyms
 like reading and playing puzzles is very beneficial to increase mental
ability
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by ashishgujral26 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • mental stagnation
  • intellectually stimulating
  • relaxation
  • meditation
  • stress reduction
  • overall well-being
  • personal development
  • life satisfaction
  • sense of achievement
  • emotional balance
  • peace of mind
  • scientific evidence
  • memory
  • learning
  • creativity
  • emotional regulation
What to do next:
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