The population of many countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared to the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweighs the disadvantages.

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The
population
Use synonyms
of any country is not just seen as figures on paper, rather it is the life line of any nation. Nowadays, the
population
Use synonyms
growth of certain countries
have
Suggestion
has
a higher proportion of youths compared to their younger ones. I believe that a large younger
population
Use synonyms
have
Suggestion
has
tremendous positive impacts than having a large
population
Use synonyms
older of older people. On the one hand, it is believed that wisdom comes with age. The older we get, the more the challenges we face and above all, the wiser we become.
Interstingly
Suggestion
Interestingly
, the values of wisdom
is not taught
Suggestion
are not taught
in the four walls of schools, but attained as you grow older.
In
Linking Words
addition older
Accept comma addition
addition, older
generarions
all the people living at the same time or of approximately the same age
generations
are needed in passing down the wealth of
knowlege
the psychological result of perception and learning and reasoning
knowledge
to the
next
Linking Words
generation through teaching and personal interactions. The Concord Newspaper revealed that over 80% of military generals of developed nations are older men who have served for many years.
This
Linking Words
is because the depth of experience they have gathered over the years are needed for critical situations
such
Linking Words
as war, diplomatic ties and most importantly in the training of young
soilders
an enlisted man or woman who serves in an army
soldiers
.
Thus
Linking Words
, we cannot do without
the older
Suggestion
the old
ones.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, I strongly believe that the aforementioned reasons are just a few
advantage
Suggestion
advantages
of the many challenges that comes with old age
such
Linking Words
as over-dependence. There are several benefits of a large
population
Use synonyms
of young people.
First
Linking Words
and foremost, the youth bring in innovations and productivity. When a nation is made of young and energetic people, they channel their energy into creative ideas that brings in profit and expansion in every sector of the nation.
Also
Linking Words
, the young
population
Use synonyms
prevents the
health economic
Accept comma addition
health, economic
burden that the older
people
Suggestion
peoples'
demands.
In other words
Linking Words
, certain diseases
such
Linking Words
as hypertension, cancers and some other conditions are all related to old age, and
this
Linking Words
population
Use synonyms
need be taken care of with a lot of funds. Since these diseases are not common among the young, the funds would be used for other
developmental
Suggestion
development
projects to help develop the economy. As an illustration, Sweden has the least elderly
population
Use synonyms
and it spends only a tenth of what Australia spends on its older citizens.
As a result
Linking Words
, spending
such
Linking Words
huge funds yearly can have a negative effect on the economy. In conclusion, I believe that the younger
population
Use synonyms
of any country has a lot to offer and it would continue to do so with little or no adverse ramification.
Submitted by M on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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