At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

It is well known that some countries have a

population

Use synonyms

with more young people than old people. Even

this

Linking Words

fact could have both advantages and disadvantages, In my opinion the positive implications of having a youthful

population

Use synonyms

over-weigh the negative ones.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages giving examples to support both

point

Suggestion

points

of view. On one hand, having

more younger

Suggestion

younger

people could lead to a lack of professionals in the society. Older

population

Use synonyms

may be more educated than

the young

Suggestion

the younger

one,

this

Linking Words

is being why they have had more time to study a professional career during their lives.

For example

Linking Words

, to become a specialist physician it is needed at least 10 years of university studies and

this

Linking Words

may not be able for a young adult yet.

In addition

Linking Words

, younger

population

Use synonyms

have

Suggestion

has

less life experience than

old

Suggestion

older

population

Use synonyms

. People after their 50’s may have been through a lot in life and they may be more prepared to solve any day-life problem than younger people.

This

Linking Words

could help to form a less stressful society.

Lastly

Linking Words

, younger populations

are

Suggestion

likely to have

higher rate

Suggestion

higher rates

a higher rate

of crime,

this

Linking Words

could be because young people have more energy to commit crime than old people. A study from the University of Chile showed that in the south of Chile, where the

population

Use synonyms

is mostly young, the rate of robs and crimes where twice higher than in the north where most of the

population

Use synonyms

where

have the quality of being; (copula, used with an adjective or a predicate noun)

were

in their 50’s and older.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, youthful populations are in general more active and

more happy

Suggestion

happier

This

Linking Words

may be because they have less old age-associated illness leading them to work more and maintain them-self more active. Adding to the fact that healthy people can work more efficiently, with

this

Linking Words

they can contribute to the economy of the country, making money

instead

Linking Words

of spending.

For instance

Linking Words

, it is a fact that old societies spend a lot of money in health for their

old

Suggestion

older

citizens. Another positive aspect of having young adult populations is that there are more chances of having outstanding sport professionals. Young people have more time and more energy than

old

Suggestion

older

people to practice and become an excellent

sport

the activity of providing for or maintaining by supplying with money or necessities

support

professional. In soccer most of the

players

Suggestion

player

retires from their soccer-career when they turn thirty years old. With old people there would be no time to start a sport career. And

last

Linking Words

but not least, young societies are more likely to have outdoor activities for the community.

This

Linking Words

could be because they are more proactive in

organize

Suggestion

organizing

those

plural of "this"

these

activities and

also

Linking Words

more likely to participate in them.

Old

Suggestion

Older

people may be too tired to go out. To conclude with the arguments given above, I firmly believe that the advantages of

youthful

Suggestion

the youthful population

population

Use synonyms

over-weigh the disadvantages. Even though, there are some positive aspects of having an older

population

Use synonyms

that

Suggestion

That

we should consider.

Aug 1, 2019

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

474 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why are more people choosing to have operation to change the way they look? Do you think this a positive or negative development?

Most artist earn low salaries and should therefore recieved fundings from government in order for them to continue thier work. to what extent do you agree?

Many teachers assign homework to students everyday. Do you think that daily homework is necessary for students?

Nowadays many students choose to take a year off before entering university. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of taking a year off, and give your own opinion about whether it is a good idea.

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?