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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

People nowadays sleep less than they used to in the past. What do you think is the reason behind this? What are the effects on individuals and people around them?

#people #reason #effects #individuals
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It has been seen that with the development of technology and wide globalization people are working longer than usual working hours.
This
Linking Words
 leads towards to less amount of sleep.Eventually
,
Accept space
,
it has both positive effects like getting more money
fulfiling
put in effect
fulfilling
 their enjoyment and negative effects like deteriorating
time
Use synonyms
 spending in social as well as with family.
This
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 will definitely affect society worst.
To begin
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 with, there are numerous reasons why people are getting less
time
Use synonyms
 for sleep than before.
First
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 and foremost reason is all
time
Use synonyms
 working nature. In present
time
Use synonyms
 if you want to have a good quality life you have to
work
Use synonyms
 two or sometimes more than jobs. Obviously, if you
work
Use synonyms
this
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 many hours eventually you'll get so tired. The
Second
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 reason, most
ofter
happening at a time subsequent to a reference time
after
often
 these jobs are not near to living place. Therefor, travelling took a significant amount of
time
Use synonyms
. For an instance, for some people travelling take almost 4-5 hours for both ways to
workplace
Suggestion
the workplace
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, people
are nowadays prefer
Suggestion
are nowadays preferring
nowadays prefer
are nowadays preferred
 less face to face
intereactin
arousing or holding the attention
interesting
interaction
interactions
 because of the internet. Most of the young
genreation
all the people living at the same time or of approximately the same age
generation
 spent
there
of them or themselves
their
time
Use synonyms
 to watch movies
,
Accept space
,
play games
,
Accept space
,
listing
hear with intention
listen
 songs or chatting with friends over the internet with the help of computers or
smartphones
Suggestion
smart phones
. On the other side
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon has
it's
of a thing, of it; possessive form of "it"
its
 own merits and demerits. To start with, not enough sleep can directly affect to
person's health
Suggestion
a person's health
the person's health
, because of that he does not pay
fully
Suggestion
full
attentation
Suggestion
attention
 to the
work
Use synonyms
 or any other activities.
This
Linking Words
 will lead to unhealthy society.
Linking Words
Moreover because
Accept comma addition
Moreover, because
 of
this
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 scenario people are spending less
time
Use synonyms
 with loved ones and living in the stress and
anxicity
(psychiatry) a relatively permanent state of worry and nervousness occurring in a variety of mental disorders, usually accompanied by compulsive behavior or attacks of panic
anxiety
.
Some times
Suggestion
Sometimes
 it has
positive effect
Suggestion
a positive effect
positive effects
 to like most of the
billionairs
a very rich person whose material wealth is valued at more than a billion dollars
billionaires
billionaires'
billionaire's
 cut their sleep hours to
work
Use synonyms
 more achieve
decent goal
Suggestion
a decent goal
. But sadly, not everyone is following that. In conclusion, because of the technology
advacncement
encouragement of the progress or growth or acceptance of something
advancement
advancements
 and long working hours people cutting
there
of them or themselves
their
 sleeping hours.In most
case
Suggestion
cases
 it will affect negatively to
person
Suggestion
the person
people
 as well his loved ones.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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