IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Nowadays, many people spend less and less time at home. What are the causes of this? What are the effects of this on individuals and on society?

#people #time #home #effects #individuals #society
People are working longer hours than ever before and they do not have
time
 to spend at
home
. Some people do not only
work
 overtime on weekdays, but
also
work
 on weekends.
This
 is because the world has become
borderless
 due to the development of means of transportation and the Internet, and competition among companies has become intense.
For example
, one of my friends who
work
for
Suggestion
in
 IT company, catches the
first
 train to go to company in the morning and take the
last
 train to get
home
 after
work
. He spends only six hours at
home
, leaving less
time
 for family.
Thus
, people who live in
such
 a global society, spend most of
time
 at their workplace. Another reason for spending less
time
 at
home
 is that the importance of individualism is increasing. People value pursuing their own goals and dreams. Chasing our dream often investing more of our
time
 in study or
work
.
For example
, my friend’s son who want to be a lawyer in the future spend most of his
time
 studying at school. Studying at school until 10:00p.m., he eats out with friends every day.
This
 often results in spending less
time
 at
home
 because they put more value on fulfilling their own dream. The decrease in
time
 spent at
home
 has both positive and negative effects, including an increase
of
Suggestion
in
 family lacking communication and economic expansion. Regarding negative impacts on individuals, family conversations may decrease since they do not have enough
time
 to spend together. In some cases, it leads to divorce and juvenile delinquency.
However
, there are
also
 some positive effects. As people spend more
time
 outside, they have more opportunities to spend money, which has an economic effect. Some people would eat out, others would spend money learning new things. In
this
 way, less
time
 people spend at
home
 has both positive and negative effects on individuals and society. In conclusion, people spend less
time
 at
home
 due to an increased workload and individualism. As it has both positive and negative impacts on our life, there is a need for us to be conscious about finding a healthy balance between the
time
 spent at
home
 and outside.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: