IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.
#information #railway #systems #six #cities
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The table shows
information
Add an article
the information
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 on the underground
railway
Use synonyms
systems
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, the year the
railway
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systems
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 initiated and the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
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 travelling per year for six cities. Generally, London has the longest route and it becomes one of the oldest underground
railway
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systems
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Los Angles still gains less popularity and it is the latest as it opened
since
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in
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 2001 and covers the
second
Linking Words
 least
railway
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 route
of
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apply
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28 km. As is presented in the table,
Tokyo
Correct article usage
the Tokyo
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railway
Use synonyms
 service had the largest
number
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 of passengers which controlled a large share with about 1927
million
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people
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 annually in 1927. Unlike other
railway
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 services, Kyoto consists of the least
number
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 of
travelers
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travellers
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 with only 45
million
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people
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. Paris and Tokyo are alike
that
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in that
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 they both are very popular and the
number
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 of
people
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 visiting them
are
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is
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 more than other
railway
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systems
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. London and Paris are 775
million
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 passengers and 1191
million
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people
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 respectively whilst Washington DC
constitute
Correct subject-verb agreement
constitutes
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for
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apply
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about 144
million
Use synonyms
 passengers each year.
Submitted by thao58947 on

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words railway, systems, number, people, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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