Some governments spend a lot of public money training individuals to be successful in international sporting events. Some people believe that this money should be spent on things that will benefit the general public instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#governments #money #individuals #events #people #benefit

It is irrefutable that nowadays government has increased their spending in sports to provide training as well as state of

art infrastructure

Suggestion

the art infrastructure

for their

sportspersons

and

this

spending

also

becomes necessary to compete at international

level

However

, some people think that

instead

of spending

Suggestion

sports it

Accept comma addition

sports, it

should be invested

for

Suggestion

local public benefits. Personally, I believe that investment to be done to proliferate standard of living of society as well as to train our athletes too. In the following paragraphs, I put forth my views to bolster my opinion. To commence with,

First

and foremost, to compete at international

level

athletes to be trained at that

level

and when these athletes won championships at international

level

Accept comma addition

level, then

then

at that moment not only athlete gets famous for his achievement and hard

work but

Accept comma addition

work, but

also

the whole country gets renowned in the world and

this

was a

pride

feeling self-respect or pleasure in something by which you measure your self-worth; or being a reason for pride

proud

moment for its public too. Like, in 1983 after winning

1st cricket world cup

Suggestion

the 1st cricket world cup

India

has became

Suggestion

has become

one of the few countries to

won

Suggestion

win

world cup

Suggestion

the world cup

and

this

would be a big achievement for any country.

On the other hand

it is

it's

also

important for the governments

to provide

Suggestion

provide

infrastructure like education institutes, hospitals for their public too. Standardized education

also increase

Suggestion

also increases

standard

Suggestion

the standard

of living of society as well as leads to crime free nation.

Furthermore

, government should

also

invest on road and

transportation which

Accept comma addition

transportation, which

also

required for daily commuters convenient as well as

theirs

of them or themselves

their

safety. These investments

also

boost the nation’s economy too. To recapitulate, I would say infrastructure required for

benefit

Suggestion

the benefit

of local society as well as for

sportspersons

but government should invest the money to keep in mind the importance of both and maintain the balance.

Submitted by sahilmanocha23 on Thu Aug 29 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

285 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some governments spend a lot of public money training individuals to be successful in international sporting events. Some people believe that this money should be spent on things that will benefit the general public instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think the best way to solve trafic congestion in cities is to provide free public transport 24 hour a day, 7 days a week. Is it good or bad, to what extent do you agree or disagree.

In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities ,so the population in the country side is decreasing Do you think it is a positive or a negative development

The internet is probably the most significant invention of the last decades. Without it our lives would be completely different. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

It's better to work alone because people in groups spend too much time talking.' Do you agree?

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience