You recently bought a piece of equipment for your kitchen but it did not work. You phoned the shop but no action was taken. Write a letter to the shop manager. In your letter ● describe the problem with the equipment ● explain what happened when you phoned the shop ● say what you would like the manager to do.

#piece #equipment #kitchen #work #shop #action #manager

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Dear Shop Manager, I write

this

Linking Words

letter as I concerned about your

product

Use synonyms

. Please let me explain

this

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. I bought an electric stove from your store 2 days ago. When I back to my home and tried to cook something, I realized that

this

Linking Words

equipment was out of order

due to

Linking Words

its usable dynamo. When I found out some bad things about

this

Linking Words

stove, I called your shop directly.

However

Linking Words

, your customer service still didn't answer my call even though I called hundreds of times and sent direct messages to them. I was very dissatisfied owing to your service.

Besides

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, I have paid your

product

Use synonyms

with the highest price. In my view, your

product

Use synonyms

is able to ensure its quality as I got it at the highest price.

However

Linking Words

, I got wrong, and these bad things came to me. Hopefully, you able to ensure your

product

Use synonyms

next time.

Besides

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, I want my money back

due to

Linking Words

your guaranteed term. If it's impossible, you can give me your other

product

Use synonyms

with the highest quality and proper price.

Thus

Linking Words

, I will not call the Police for these problems. Sincerely, Your Customer

Submitted by patricius.yohanes on Wed May 01 2024

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Tone

Try to maintain a more formal tone throughout the letter, avoiding phrases that might seem too casual or confrontational, such as 'I got wrong, and these bad things came to me' and 'I will not call the Police for these problems'.

Clarity

Ensure clarity when describing the problem with the equipment, specifying the issue in a straightforward manner.

Approach

Avoid exaggerated statements or threats, like calling the police, as they may not contribute positively to achieving your goal in a complaint letter.

Structure

Good structure with clear paragraphs for each aspect of the letter, making it easy to follow.

Formality

Effective use of a formal greeting and closing, suitable for the context of a complaint letter to a manager.

Content

You successfully communicated the main points: the problem with the equipment, the attempt to contact customer service, and the resolution you seek.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

189 words

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