Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

Music

is one of popular entertainment in modern times.

In addition

, proponents of

music

lovers often argue that

music

is a catalyst in bonding different cultures and ages people together. From my perspective, I

similarly

believe in

this

statement. One primary reason is that no entering regulation is set

Suggestion

music

This

means that there is no boundary in

this

field to distinguish different nations, races and ages. In

this

case, people can link to various kinds of people in the world.

This

concept can be exemplified by video games,

such

entertainment requires multi-skills and hand-eye coordination but not everyone possess

this

kind of skills.

Therefore

, video games can only gather the people who have the same talented. In

such

circumstance, compare to

music

, there is no limitation when people walk into

this

field so it is easier to cater different group of people in

music

. It might be claimed that different language in

music

cannot bring people together.

Nevertheless

, it is indefensible. Most people listening to

music

is not trying

Suggestion

are not trying

to figure out the meaning of each

words

Suggestion

word

, they enjoy in the rhythm of

music

and feel the feeling that convey by the song. In other word,

this

means that people gathering together because they share

same mood

Suggestion

the same mood

while listening the

music

For example

, in the carnival,

music

with

Suggestion

exciting and fast rhythm can make everyone feel pleasant. Meanwhile, they are sharing the same mood which brings them in the gala. In conclusion, I strongly agree that

music

can enhance the bond between each other no matter the cultures and ages. Without any regulations in

music

can attract more people to

this

broad field and enjoy the same feeling they have.

Submitted by ichihyi.lin on Fri Aug 30 2019

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

283 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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