Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

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Music

Use synonyms

is one of popular entertainment in modern times.

In addition

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, proponents of

music

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lovers often argue that

music

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is a catalyst in bonding different cultures and ages people together. From my perspective, I

similarly

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believe in

this

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statement. One primary reason is that no entering regulation is set

Suggestion

music

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This

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means that there is no boundary in

this

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field to distinguish different nations, races and ages. In

this

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case, people can link to various kinds of people in the world.

This

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concept can be exemplified by video games,

such

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entertainment requires multi-skills and hand-eye coordination but not everyone possess

this

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kind of skills.

Therefore

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, video games can only gather the people who have the same talented. In

such

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circumstance, compare to

music

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, there is no limitation when people walk into

this

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field so it is easier to cater different group of people in

music

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. It might be claimed that different language in

music

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cannot bring people together.

Nevertheless

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, it is indefensible. Most people listening to

music

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is not trying

Suggestion

are not trying

to figure out the meaning of each

words

Suggestion

word

, they enjoy in the rhythm of

music

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and feel the feeling that convey by the song. In other word,

this

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means that people gathering together because they share

same mood

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the same mood

while listening the

music

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For example

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, in the carnival,

music

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with

Suggestion

exciting and fast rhythm can make everyone feel pleasant. Meanwhile, they are sharing the same mood which brings them in the gala. In conclusion, I strongly agree that

music

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can enhance the bond between each other no matter the cultures and ages. Without any regulations in

music

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can attract more people to

this

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broad field and enjoy the same feeling they have.

Submitted by ichihyi.lin on Fri Aug 30 2019

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

283 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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