Major companies use sports events to promote their product. Some people think it has a negative impact on sports. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Sport events, bring together lots of people. These people include individuals of different age and gender.
Also
Linking Words
sport events create the avenue for companies to advertise their products to a large gathering of people.
In other words
Linking Words
, they have the advantage of promoting their products to the crowd. I do not agree that it has a negative impact on sports.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the organisers of the sport
events
Suggestion
event
screen products that are to be advertised to the crowd.
Hence
Linking Words
indecent or banned products do not pass through.
This
Linking Words
is important in order to prevent sanctions from regulatory agencies and the government.
For example
Linking Words
, adult products are not promoted in sporting events.
Secondly
Linking Words
, sport is a major force that
bring
Suggestion
brings
people of different religious beliefs and background together in one place.
Thus
Linking Words
creating an atmosphere of peace and tranquility.
This
Linking Words
effect is positive and could spread to the society at large.
Additionally
Linking Words
, with these product
promotion
Suggestion
promotions
, companies tend to sell more of their products and
hence
Linking Words
more revenue through tax for the government. In conclusion, promotion of
companies products
Accept comma addition
companies, products
do not have
Suggestion
does not have
negative impact
Suggestion
a negative impact
on sports when these are advertised during sporting events.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: