The position of women in society has changed markedly in the last 20 years. Many of the problems young people now experience, such as juvenile delinquency, arise from the fact that many married women now work and are not at home to care for their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion,

#position #women #society #years #people #delinquency #fact #work #home #care #children

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Nowadays, it has been observed that, there is an increase in the rate of children's crime. Some people argue that,

this

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is mainly because of the busy work lifestyle of their mothers and mothers do not get enough period to pamper the children. I am not agreeing with

this

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opinion and the following essay state points to support my view.

Firstly

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, the predominant reason for the growth in the crime rates with the kids are because of the influence from the movies and the cartoons what they are watching. Most of the children like to follow and imitate the character what they see on the television.

In addition

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this

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, they feel excited and proud when they act like their heroes.

For example

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, in a survey conducted in Kerala by the government in the primary school, reveals that more than 50% of the students are addicted to the cartoon characters.

Furthermore

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, they always show vigorous actions in the class.

This

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clearly shows the involvement of the shows in the development of a kid's mental growth.

Secondly

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, the working mothers usually give extra care to the children when they are near to them. They give more attention towards kid's daily activities and in their overall development to make sure that, their babies are doing good. During the work, they send the kids to day care, where they get entertainment and support from the trained teachers.

Moreover

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, day cares are free from the screenplay and babies get enough hours to interact with the same age group. These actually help the babies to develop as better individuals.

For example

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, in Kerala, most of the IT companies has arrangement to look after the working women's babies. These babies show active development and have a good character. In conclusion, it is because of the unwanted screen time like cartoons and family drama, kids are acting in a different way.

Additionally

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, the infant care centres have more positive feedback among society.

Hence

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we cannot say that, the reason for the crime is not because of less family time.

Submitted by uchitha1988 on Tue Sep 03 2019

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

342 words

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