Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

There are several reasons when people feel happy in
life
, some people believe
money
can bring their dream
life
come true, but some people disagree. Those people believe that
money
is
important but
Accept comma addition
important, but
not the biggest reason to obtain a pleasant
life
. Having a good relationship with
family
Suggestion
the family
is rather than having a
lot
of
money
.
However
, some people earn a
lot
of
money
by working hard, because they believe
this
is the way to make a dream
life
come true,
such
as a having luxury house, buying a famous brand car or
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
around the world. It seems to be an indicator of
this
modern
life
. According to research, 76% of citizens in Taiwan,
think
subsequently or soon afterward (often used as sentence connectors)
then
when you become a rich person,
life
is going to easier and happier.
On the other hand
, some people think
money
is taken an important role in
life but
Accept comma addition
life, but
not the biggest reason to make people feel satisfied with their lives because
money
cannot buy everything,
hence
, they are more considering spending time with family rather than earning a
lot
of
money
. For those people, they believe a strong family relationship is the main way to build up a happy
life
.
For example
, a famous businessman in his speech, he mentioned that even though he is a rich person but he is not
happy
Suggestion
happier
than he expected. His original intention was earning a
lot
of
money
to give his family a happy
life
without worry about
money
. But, he regrets his decision, his family members are not closer to him now. In conclusion,
although
many people think
money
is the main way to make
life
happy and comfortable, some people still believe a strong support system should be considered.
me
Suggestion
Me
of them.
Submitted by kina0522 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial security
  • Basic needs
  • Comfort
  • Luxury
  • Freedom
  • Altruistic
  • Philanthropy
  • Nurturing relationships
  • Fulfillment
  • Sense of accomplishment
  • Physical well-being
  • Spiritual beliefs
  • Community involvement
  • Gratitude
  • Mindfulness
  • Simple pleasures
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