IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The urban transport system receives more funds compared to the rural transport system? Why do you think it is so? How can it be solved.

#transport #system #funds
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The transportation system in the
cities
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are
Change the verb form
is
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highly
Correct quantifier usage
more highly
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 funded than those of the smaller
towns
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. I believe it is
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as
Change preposition
apply
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a result of the high
population
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 of the
cities
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,
Correct word choice
and
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also
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 because
cities
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 contribute higher taxes,
however
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, funding can be increased for the smaller
towns
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 through migration initiatives. In
this
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 essay, we will examine these two causes and the solution.
Firstly
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, city residents contribute higher taxes, and they
out-number
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outnumber
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 local residents .
As a result
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 of the dense
population
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 in the metropolis, more taxes are collected,
hence
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 leading to
a
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apply
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higher
revenue
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 in these
areas
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.
Also
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, the dense
population
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 has created a need for constant maintenance of these facilities.
For example
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,
according to
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 the 2006 Nigerian Census, Lagos state had a
population
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 of
Correct article usage
a 25million
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25million
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25 million
while
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 Ogbomoso had just 250,000 and
these
Correct pronoun usage
this
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 caused the Lagos state government a 35% increase in transport maintenance as against the 10% expended in Ogbomoso. In order to resolve
this
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, it is advised that migration to smaller
towns
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 should be encouraged, so as to create meaningful development of these
areas
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,
consequently
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 increasing tax
revenue
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 for
government
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the government
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 to implement road projects. Unarguably, rural migration supports growth and development and these can be encouraged through various incentives
such
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 as payment of monthly allowance to migrants, in order to encourage them to stay in
such
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 places.
These
Correct pronoun usage
This
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 is the strategy currently being adopted by Italy.
Hence
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, an increase in local
population
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 will result in increased
revenue
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 for road projects. In conclusion, the transportation system of the
cities
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 receives a higher budget than the smaller
towns
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 because the
cities
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 are populated, and their infrastructures need to be constantly maintained.
Likewise
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, more income is generated from the urban
areas
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. In order to resolve
this
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 disparity, citizens should be encouraged to live in the smaller
towns
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 to ensure higher
revenue
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 from these
areas
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.
This
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 will provide more funds for the authorities to spend on road projects.

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Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is well-structured and includes a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. It effectively follows a logical sequence of ideas and maintains coherence throughout.
Task Achievement
The main points and arguments are relevant to the task, and are supported with specific examples and explanations. However, some aspects of the task could be further addressed for a more complete response.
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