Some people say that mobile phones are unnecessary for young group while others find that its useful for younger ones discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #phones #group #ones

It is a debatable issue whether mobile phones are good for teenagers or not.

some

Suggestion

Some

individuals argued that it is unnecessary for

young group

Suggestion

young groups

a young group

the young group

Accept space

However

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I favour the ones who opine that it is useful for young ones. I will discuss both the conflicting arguments in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, some people argued that mobile phones are bad things for children. There are quite reasons behind

this

First

and foremost is children give more attention to mobile phones rather than studies and social activities

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To be more precise

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if more students spend their time on mobile phones,

then

conjunction used in comparatives

than

their academic performance will be low. A research is carried out in

this

direction revealed that 90% of the students who uses the mobile phone at

tremendous rate

Suggestion

a tremendous rate

tremendous rates

Accept space

they are often weak in their academic field.

Moreover

, teenagers see many vulnerable activities on

internet

Suggestion

the internet

In other words

, it will encourage them to attain bad habits

Suggestion

their own.

For instance

, many advertisements are presented on

youtube

Suggestion

YouTube

and social sites based on vulnerable activities, it encourages them to do same and become

culprit

Suggestion

the culprit

of society.

However

, I favour the ones who reckon that mobile phones are good for the development of teenagers

Accept space

one

Suggestion

One

of the most vivid

reason

Suggestion

reasons

is mobile inculcate motor skills in children.

they

Suggestion

They

do a lot of practical activities on it which they cannot attain from other resources rather than technological gadgets

Accept space

To exemplify

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most

Suggestion

mostly

of young children spend their time on playing games on phones which teaches them to handle the situation. When they play puzzle games, it will boost their level of thinking and try to solve

this

by various ways.

Besides

this

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mobiles are

source

Suggestion

the source

of vast knowledge. Nowadays, most of the children use

internet

Suggestion

the internet

on mobiles, it will help them to understand the academic topics as well as other social topics. Due to

this

, they can get profound knowledge about any topic

Accept space

For example

, if they use

internet

Suggestion

the internet

in their

studies they

Accept comma addition

studies, they

will get 20% more marks than others who do not use. To recapitulate, after analysing aforementioned, it can be deduced that

although

other individuals think that mobile phones influence them to walk on bad

path but

Accept comma addition

path, but

I believe that it is

necessary thing

Suggestion

a necessary thing

for young children leads them to get achievements.

Thu Sep 19 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

379 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that mobile phones are unnecessary for young group while others find that its useful for younger ones discuss both views and give your opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?

Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in sport which are played in teams, like footbool, while other people think that taking part in individuals sports, like tennis or swimming, is better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Companies should encourage employees who work in a high position to leave at the age of 55 in order to give opportunities to the new generation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion

The table below gives information about population in Australia and Malaysia in 1980 and 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.