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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion

#money #time
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Some people believe that earning more
money
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 is more essential than having
free
Suggestion
freer
 hours, while others think that having more free
time
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 is more important than a good
financila
involving financial matters
financial
 status. In my opinion,
although
Linking Words
money
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 can solve most of our basic problems, human's requirements are not limited to
money
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 as we
also
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 need to socialize and strengthen our relations to feel happy and that requires more spare
time
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. It is thought that
money
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 is the most important factor in our life as it can enormously affect our family's life. If one of our family members has a health problem, the
first
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 solution would be searching for the best health
center
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centre
 with professional doctors. Staying at home and spending more
time
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 with them would not make them better and cure them.
Therefore
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, the whole process may cost a lot, so people need enough
money
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 to cover their necessities.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some other people consider that without having enough free
time
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 to spend with family we will lose our motivation for improvement. Families who spend reasonable
time
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 together can build strong relations and that would motivate them to continue their activities and improve. I am a teacher and based on my observations those students who spend most of their spare
time
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 with their parents are considerably happier and more motivated than those who spend
time
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 with their babysitters as their parents work 9 to 5 every day. To conclude,
although
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 the more we
earn the
Accept comma addition
earn, the
 better we cover ours and our family's basic demands, I believe that we need to build strong relations with our family and without it, we and our family members would become sad and
demotivated
Suggestion
 so it is important to take enough
time
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 to spend with family.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • facilitating
  • lifestyle
  • professional development
  • increased stress
  • work-life balance
  • hobbies
  • quality time
  • physical and mental health
  • financial constraints
  • luxury items
  • overall well-being
  • personal growth
  • middle ground
  • sacrificing
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