Many museum across the world charge an entry fee from all visitors. Some people agree that entry to the museum should be free. To what extent do you agree or disagree???

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Use synonyms
Museum
Suggestion
The museum
plays a significant role in our society.As these are the place where we can get knowledge about our tradition and culture. In some museums, there is a policy that the visitor
have
Suggestion
has
to pay
money
Use synonyms
before entering while
other
plural of other; the people or things not already mentioned
others
are free to visit
.
Accept space
.
I certainly believe that both of the ideas have equal advantage and
few drawbacks
Suggestion
a few drawbacks
. Fire of all
,
Accept space
,
money
Use synonyms
collected from the visitors is utilised for the maintenance of the
museum
Use synonyms
. For instant, it can be used to cover the operational bill, repairing cost and staff payment
.
Accept space
.
In fact, there are various delicate
artifact
Suggestion
artefacts
artefact
which need to be preserved properly. So by collecting
entry
Use synonyms
fees, they can do all the maintenance work.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the
museum
Use synonyms
can
also
Linking Words
generate their own revenue to improve and provide new technology
museum
Use synonyms
.
Accept space
.
For example
Linking Words
, hologram and 3d animation facilities are used in
museum
Use synonyms
to attract people.
Lastly
Linking Words
, the
money
Use synonyms
earned from the
museum
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
helps to increase the revenue of the nation. To illustrate, in Bhutan 20 percent of GDP is contributed from the
money
Use synonyms
gained by
Use synonyms
museum
Suggestion
the museum
. Overall
,
Accept space
,
there are various points that
supports
Suggestion
support
the idea of charging
Use synonyms
entry fee
Suggestion
an entry fee
entry fees
.
However
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
museum
Suggestion
museums
are the place which
convey
Suggestion
conveys
about the history and culture of the nation. So by imposing fees it
disencourage
Suggestion
discourages
discourage
people to visit. As majority of folks believe that rather wasting
money
Use synonyms
on
museum
Use synonyms
, they can watch historical movies and documentaries which would be more interesting and informative.
Linking Words
Moreover by
Accept comma addition
Moreover, by
charging bucks for
entry
Use synonyms
, only a mass of people are able to pay. Whereas, people who are poor and unemployed cannot afford to pay. In conclusion, there are various facts and figures that support the idea of charging
money
Use synonyms
for
entry
Use synonyms
in
Use synonyms
museum
Suggestion
the museum
a museum
museums
.
Linking Words
However there
Accept comma addition
However, there
are certain drawbacks which must be taken into consideration

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
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