Some people believe that the women should play an equal role as men in country’s police and military fierce, such as army, while others, think women are not suitable for these king of work. Discuss and give your opinion.

#people #women #role #men #country’s #police #army #work

Nowadays, more women are joining in

nation’s

Suggestion

the nation’s

a nation’s

military and

police

forces and have

contribute

Suggestion

contributed

significantly at both

war

sites as well as civil regions.

However

, some people believe women can’t

work

Suggestion

with

these forces due to physical hardships. In the following passage, I will explain the important needs for women to be employed before declaring my stance. At present, increasing number of women showing interest to

work

Suggestion

with

country’s military force is an eccentric change happening in our country. As they undergo various trainings to empower them to

work

in any situations gives you both mental and physical stability to embrace the challenges.

For instance

, in US military force many women have played

vital role

Suggestion

a vital role

during

Iraq

Suggestion

the Iraq war

war

This

shows that they are capable enough to

work

war

sites.

In addition

, for both army civil and administration departments are employed with women employees.

Therefore

, even though there is

enormous physical strain

Suggestion

an enormous physical strain

in the

war

sites, with the advance training programmes will aid them to

work

any locations.

Furthermore

, women play a significant role in

police forces

Suggestion

the police forces

as they need to handle women offenders.

For example

, a recent robbery case in Chennai, 2 women

were suspected

Suggestion

was suspected

, and taken

Suggestion

into

custody, in

such

instance women

Suggestion

instance, women

police

are

effective

Suggestion

effectively

used to interrogate them to prevent from any sensitive issue if they were handled by

men

Suggestion

a man police team

man police team

police

team.

Moreover

, it is believed that they have

better

Suggestion

the best

view in analysing criminal cases.

Thus

, it is assumed women are greatly required to handle woman criminals and to investigate the case with

different approach

Suggestion

a different approach

different approaches

. To conclude,

few decades

Suggestion

a few decades

ago, people were hesitant of women joining nation’s military forces, but the situation has changed, where they are trained to

work

any situations and they can contribute effectively too.

Submitted by muxamadaminabdulloyev on Sat Sep 28 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
The leaders or directors of organisations are often older people. Some people think that young people can also be good leaders. Do you agree or disagree?
It can be seen that chairmans/CEO's in many organisations are senior people.Some argued that older leaders should be replaced by young citizens.I believe that this phenomenon is not going to be a wise decision and i completely disagree that argument because they have lack of experiences and they may underestimate their senior employees.In this essay, i will be discussing on that points.
7
band
When we meet someone for the first time, we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
These days, most of the majority take the speedy idea of people from either the first looking or conversation and some societies believe that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. Honestly, I agree with that opinion, and thus, this essay will discuss the both advantages and disadvantages.
7.5
band
Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced?
It is certainly true that the depiction of graphic violence in movies can contribute to social issues. There are several reasons for this concern, including the possibility that viewers, especially fans of actors portraying violence, might be influenced by what they see and the lack of restrictions on underage viewers. Several measures could be taken by societies and governments to improve the situation. These include raising awareness that film violence is acting and not being emulated, as well as restricting children's access to inappropriate content.
5
band
Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary
many people hold, give you that their salary is extremely important while choosing a career, others opine that loving them a job is what matters. Personally, I think that it is better to pursue a desirable occupation. Considering that doing a desirable work is the key to the realization, and the passion makes fulfillment.
5.5
band
Some people think that history has nothings or little to tell us, while others think that studying the past can help us better understand he present.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
The debate between whether should history tell something useful to us remains perennial in these years. While some people think that history telling little to us, I find myself more aligned with a proponent of history is quite significant to us and we can learn deeply through history.

Some people believe that the women should play an equal role as men in country’s police and military fierce, such as army, while others, think women are not suitable for these king of work. Discuss and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

The leaders or directors of organisations are often older people. Some people think that young people can also be good leaders. Do you agree or disagree?

When we meet someone for the first time, we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced?

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary

Some people think that history has nothings or little to tell us, while others think that studying the past can help us better understand he present.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.