Some people say International Sports events help in world peace. Do you agree or disagree?

In recent decade, people think that peace
will be came
Suggestion
will come
from sports. I totally agree with
this
statement due to benefits of sports
such
as establishing friendly relation as well as boosting national
economy
. One of the main reasons is that it
make
Suggestion
makes
people
more closely
Suggestion
closer
.
First
, by holding sport events of international stature, it
help
Suggestion
helps
people around the world to expose to different cultures.
This
means that the country where hosts that events will attract a great deal of audience from
another
not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied
other
countries,
as a result
more and more people know about that nation as well as love their culture, language and so on. Take Viet Nam is an example, they
was chosen
Suggestion
were chosen
to host the 31st Southeast Asian Games in 2021. Some 11,000 athletes and over 10,000,000 audiences are expected to participate in the SEA Games.
On the other hand
, another reason is that sports flourish
nation
Suggestion
nation's
economy
. Since sports are considered as a business in some countries, it
alleviate
Suggestion
alleviates
the burden of national. In fact, sports develop
economy
Suggestion
an economy
from lucrative
income
Accept comma addition
income, such
such
as tourist, services, on
forth which
Accept comma addition
forth, which
held countries gain profit
instead
of making economic war.
For instance
, according to the report in 2018, contribution of sport to Viet Nam
economy
increase by 8% compared with that number in 2017. In conclusion, it is true when we think that sports have many
impact
Suggestion
impacts
on world peace. I strongly recommend that
government
Suggestion
the government
should make more events to help people around the world
closely
Suggestion
closer
together.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!