IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You recently did a short cookery course. The cookery school asked for your feedback o this course. Write a letter to the course director at the cookery school. describe what you enjoyed about the course say how much cooking you've done since the course suggest another cookery course you'd like the school to offer.

#cookery #course #school #feedback #director #ve #offer
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Sir, I am writing to you regarding the student feedback you asked
to
Correct pronoun usage
me to
show examples
 provide you through a letter. I did my
course
Use synonyms
 at your
school
Use synonyms
 about continental food and English breakfast almost two
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
 ago. It was
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 right decision to chose your
school
Use synonyms
 for learning cookery, because the things, I learned here are very useful in
practicle
Correct your spelling
practical
practice
 working experience.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, I enjoyed my time here during
Use synonyms
course
Correct article usage
the course
show examples
 because of
learning
Add an article
the learning
a learning
show examples
 environment.
For example
Linking Words
, here at
this
Linking Words
school
Use synonyms
 and specifically in
said
Add an article
the said
show examples
course
Use synonyms
,
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
show examples
teach
Change the verb form
teaches
show examples
 you in
actual
Add an article
the actual
show examples
 kitchen after
Add a hyphen
simulation-based
show examples
simulation
Correct article usage
the simulation
show examples
 based lecture.
I
Correct pronoun usage
What I
show examples
enjoyed the most about the
course
Use synonyms
 competitions, those held after every lecture and provide you
opportunity
Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
show examples
 to express yourself. After completion of my
course
Use synonyms
, I started my job as
breakfast
Add an article
a breakfast
show examples
 chef at a
Add a hyphen
three-star
show examples
three star
Add a hyphen
three-star
show examples
 hotel located near Brighton beach. Now I am working as
assistant
Add an article
an assistant
show examples
 chef in continental food production of
five star
Add a hyphen
five-star
show examples
 hotel’s kitchen.
Although
Linking Words
 your
school
Use synonyms
 has all the expertise of continental food and English breakfast, there is no
asian
Change the capitalization
Asian
show examples
 cusine
course
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, your
school
Use synonyms
 should start that
course
Use synonyms
. Looking forward to your kind regards. yours faithfully, Bilal Akbar.
Submitted by belalakbar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: