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Writing Samples /
Band 6

You recently did a short cookery course. The cookery school asked for your feedback o this course. Write a letter to the course director at the cookery school. describe what you enjoyed about the course say how much cooking you've done since the course suggest another cookery course you'd like the school to offer.

#cookery #course #school #feedback #director #ve #offer
Dear Sir, I am writing to you regarding the student feedback you asked
to
Correct pronoun usage
me to
show examples
 provide you through a letter. I did my
course
 at your
school
 about continental food and English breakfast almost two
year
Change to a plural noun
years
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 ago. It was
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 right decision to chose your
school
 for learning cookery, because the things, I learned here are very useful in
practicle
Correct your spelling
practical
practice
 working experience.
Furthermore
, I enjoyed my time here during
course
Correct article usage
the course
show examples
 because of
learning
Add an article
the learning
a learning
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 environment.
For example
, here at
this
school
 and specifically in
said
Add an article
the said
show examples
course
,
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
show examples
teach
Change the verb form
teaches
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 you in
actual
Add an article
the actual
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 kitchen after
Add a hyphen
simulation-based
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simulation
Correct article usage
the simulation
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 based lecture.
I
Correct pronoun usage
What I
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enjoyed the most about the
course
 competitions, those held after every lecture and provide you
opportunity
Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
show examples
 to express yourself. After completion of my
course
, I started my job as
breakfast
Add an article
a breakfast
show examples
 chef at a
Add a hyphen
three-star
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three star
Add a hyphen
three-star
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 hotel located near Brighton beach. Now I am working as
assistant
Add an article
an assistant
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 chef in continental food production of
five star
Add a hyphen
five-star
show examples
 hotel’s kitchen.
Although
 your
school
 has all the expertise of continental food and English breakfast, there is no
asian
Change the capitalization
Asian
show examples
 cusine
course
.
Therefore
, your
school
 should start that
course
. Looking forward to your kind regards. yours faithfully, Bilal Akbar.
Submitted by belalakbar on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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