some people say thay it is better to promote healthy lifestyle than spend so much money treat obese people. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #thay #lifestyle #money

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Nowadays, people believe that it is

preference

Suggestion

preferred

in promoting healthy

behavior

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviour

behaviours

than spending a great deal of money to treat overweight people. I totally agree with

this

Linking Words

statement because it

help

Suggestion

helps

improve public health and save national budget. One of the main reasons is that it is the best way to save budget of a country.

First

Linking Words

, since a sustainable development of

nation

Suggestion

a nation

the nation

nations

requires to have many investments in many fields, paying for

treat

Suggestion

treating

obesity can put more burden on financial resource.

This

Linking Words

means that if

citizen

Suggestion

citizens

a citizen

have a knowledge about balance

diets combination

Accept comma addition

diets, combination

with physical activities,

government

Suggestion

the government

will not need to spent million to cure these obese

individual

Suggestion

individuals

. Another reason is that healthy lifestyles help people enhance expectation of life. In

other

(often plural) a command given by a superior (e.g., a military or law enforcement officer) that must be obeyed

order

to improving

community’s longevity

Suggestion

the community’s longevity

, healthy meals not only help people avoid corpulence but

also

Linking Words

other diseases that may be fatal

for

Suggestion

human’s

Suggestion

human

health. In fact, people have good eating habit as well as consume other high

fiber

a slender and greatly elongated substance capable of being spun into yarn

fibre

food,

such

Linking Words

as fresh fruit, vegetables leading to reduce fat, provide vitamin which play vital role

for

Suggestion

bodies

Suggestion

body

development and optimum immune system.

For instance

Linking Words

, consume enough Vitamin E which

help

Suggestion

helps

people to slower their aging process or prevent cancers. In conclusion, because of

many benefits

Suggestion

the many benefits

save

Suggestion

to save

money for government, improve community

healthy

Suggestion

health

as well, so government should broaden citizen horizon more than spend money in

treatment

Suggestion

treating

obesity.

Sat Oct 05 2019

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

229 words

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some people say thay it is better to promote healthy lifestyle than spend so much money treat obese people. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Fully explain your ideas

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience

The best way to teach children to cooperate is through team sports at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.

Some people believe that it is good for a country 's culture to import foreign movies and TV programmes. Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.