Parents should not pressure their children to choose particular profession. Young people should have the freedom to choose path they like. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#parents #pressure #children #profession #people #freedom #path

It is widely accepted that children should not be imposed by their parents

Suggestion

determining a particular

career

. While some people believe that young people should be encouraged to decide the path they desire freely, others oppose

this

idea. I the final analysis, I strongly agree with the former view due to the reasons that will be justified in

this

essay. The

first

reason for

this

is because every child has different abilities.

In other words

, applying children to a prestigious profession is likely to limit their talents and creativity in other jobs.

For instance

, a child who is prone to imagination and art can hardly success in jobs related to calculation like accountants, business, etc. Ultimately, parents' expectations become a great pressure on their children.

In addition

to the above, I

also

believe that passion is the main motivation to foster

children's profession

Suggestion

the children's profession

That is

to say, parents need to respect

children's interests

Suggestion

the children's interests

and passions. One clear example is that a

favorite

something regarded with special favor or liking

favourite

job makes children feel happier than those who follow their parents' footsteps. The desire will help them to devote their

life

Suggestion

lives

to their

career

path. The argument in

favor

promote over another

favour

of the parental orientation could be that parents have much experience of life and love their children very much. To put it simply, parents expect their children to live well and happy, and build a bright future for them.

However

, in my opinion, it is unwise to accept

parents' arrangement

Suggestion

the parents' arrangement

Although

parental guidance plays a vital part of

children's particular profession

Suggestion

the children's particular profession

, it depends on children's decision.

Instead forcing

Accept comma addition

Instead, forcing

children, parents should strive to create an environment that encourages children's talents and passions. In conclusion, despite some arguments, I strongly believe that parents should avoid pressuring their children to follow specific

career

paths.

Moreover

, young people need the freedom and parental support in the future

career

Submitted by JAS on Mon Oct 07 2019

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Parents should not pressure their children to choose particular profession. Young people should have the freedom to choose path they like. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Question, without capital punishment our lives less secure crimes and violence increase , capital punishments is essential to control violence to what extent do you agree or disagree ?

As countries develop, their populations tend to live individually or in small family units. What are the causes of this trend and what are the effects on society？

Some people think that we should invent a new language for international communication. Will the benefits of this outweigh the problems associated with it?

NOW a days people are using more consumer goods like refrigerators or washing machines. Does it has more advantages or disadvantages

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.