Some parents do not allow their children to watch TV during school days. Others allow their children to watch TV as long as their school work is finished. Discuss both views

#parents #children #tv #school #work

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Some children are not allowed by their parents to watch

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during

school

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days while some others are given the complete freedom to engage in

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watching provided that they have completed their

school

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assignments. I strongly agree with the latter view. On the one hand, some parents opt to prohibit their children from watching

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school

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days for a few underlying reasons.

Firstly

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, they may end up not being able to control the amount of time they spend watching

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. In that case, it is likely for them to find it hard to focus on finishing their

school

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tasks, which can

consequently

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lead to a poor academic performance.

Secondly

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, because prolonged exposure to

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screen can cause one’s eye vision to deteriorate, some children are restricted to watching

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only on the weekends to prevent

such

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a health risk.

Thirdly

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, some parents feel the need to encourage them to get involved in other activities

such

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as exercising.

This

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can help prevent them from having an

otherwise

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sedentary lifestyle.

On the other hand

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, it can offer a few benefits to children.

To begin

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with, being a great source of entertainment,

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can help them relieve their stress and relax.

Therefore

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, as children immerse themselves in it, it can reduce their physical and mental exhaustion after a tiring

school

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day.

Furthermore

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, they can benefit from a wide range of education programs available on

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, and

thus

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get the chance to broaden their non-academic knowledge. To sum up, I am firmly convinced that the benefits of children watching

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school

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days outweigh the potential drawbacks. The risks can be greatly minimized if parents can advise their children to watch

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school

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days in moderation.

Submitted by sandroleung on Thu Oct 10 2019

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

285 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

structured routines
academic performance
discipline
limiting
physical activities
influence
screen time
positive reinforcement
prioritize
time management
motivation
educational programs
supplement
appropriately selected
regulated
excessive screen time
health issues

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Some parents do not allow their children to watch TV during school days. Others allow their children to watch TV as long as their school work is finished. Discuss both views

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some employers want to be able to contact their staff at all times, even on holidays. Does this development have more advantages than disadvantages?

In some countries, young people like to live on their own or live with their friends after finishing school. Some think it is a good idea. Do you agree or disagree?

Traffic and housing problems could be solved by moving large companies, factories and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries people use electric devices for daily house chores while some think it is an expensive energy source and we ought to use gas instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion.?

Nowadays, instead of locally sourced produce, many supermarkets sell a variety of foods imported from countries all across the world. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?