Some people argue that governments should spend more money on developing bullet and metro rail facilities, while others support the idea of spending money on upgrading current public transport system. This essay analyses these viewpoints in the following paragraphs and concludes with my opinion.

#people #governments #money #bullet #metro #rail #facilities #support #idea #transport #system #analyses #viewpoints #paragraphs

In present world railway system and

road

system both

Accept comma addition

system, both

are most important

transport

methods.Some believe that countries

should spent

Suggestion

should spend

money

on building new railways. Others argue that

government

Suggestion

the government

should spent

Suggestion

should spend

money

on development of

road

transport

methods. In

this

essay I will discuss both

side

Suggestion

sides

relevant to

this

topic

To begin

with, trains are able to carry more passengers at the same

time

As a result

this

, the amount of carbon dioxide release

in to

expresses motion to a point on, or within, something

into

air

Suggestion

the air

will decrease.

Moreover

, trains are much faster and

cheap

Suggestion

cheaper

to travel. By travelling using the trains, travellers avoid the traffic jams and

this

help

Suggestion

helps

them to earn their

time

and work on

time

. For an instance, in my country Sri Lanka

Suggestion

it takes 1.30 hours for my

mom

to go to work if she

use

Suggestion

uses

the

road

transport but

Accept comma addition

transport, but

by train it takes only 45 minutes.

On the other hand

, sometimes trains being delayed and cancelled.

As a result

this

plural of "this"

these

those

passengers become inconvenient because they have to wait

long

Suggestion

a long time

time

for the

train. For an example, travellers who using public

transport

such

as buses

are not facing to

Suggestion

are not facing

these types of situation because there are various options in

road

transportation.

In addition

, it costs

enormous amount

Suggestion

an enormous amount

to construct new railroads than public

transport

Also

, nowadays most of travellers use their own vehicles because of

this

there is no point of

spend

Suggestion

spending

huge amount of

money

on building new railroads. In conclusion, some argue that

government

Suggestion

the government

should spent

Suggestion

should spend

money

on constructing new railroad than roads because, trains are able to carry more passengers and they are more faster.

However

, opponents believe that countries

should spent

Suggestion

should spend

money

maintaince

activity involved in maintaining something in good working order

maintenance

and development of existing roads because passengers have to wait

long

Suggestion

a long time

time

if the trains cancelled and building new railways costs lots of

money

In contrast

, I think countries should pay more attention on constructing railroads because of huge benefits and convenience of using trains.

Submitted by tashigamage08 on Thu Oct 17 2019

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

325 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people argue that governments should spend more money on developing bullet and metro rail facilities, while others support the idea of spending money on upgrading current public transport system. This essay analyses these viewpoints in the following paragraphs and concludes with my opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You are visiting a town where you once worked. Write to a friend you worked with there. Include the following in your letter: •Tell your friend about your life now. •Give him/her details of your visit. •Arrange how you can meet.

The growth in population in cities means that parks should now be used for residential and business purposes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today’s very competitive world, a worker has to possess multiple skills to succeed.] Among the skills that a worker should possess, which skill do you think is more important, social skills or good qualifications?

Some people say job satisfaction is more important than job security, others think people cannot always enjoy their jobs. So having a permanent job is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.