Some parents think it is good to give their children mobile phones while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#parents #children #phones

It is undeniably true that mobile phones, lately, have been an indispensable part of human

lives

Suggestion

life

. Few demographics argue that it is fine to give

cell

phones to children while others opine that

this

habit can invite grave repercussions. I personally believe, children should not be allowed to use

cell

phones for various reasons. These days, mobile phones are not just looked upon as the means of communication, as it

offerswide range

Suggestion

offers a wide range

offers wide range

of other applications like games, social networking sites and so on. Children not only kill their spare time by playing games

Suggestion

cell

phones but

Accept comma addition

phones, but

also

learn to click pictures, make videos and indulge in other creative works.

Furthermore

, parents

also

get free time while their kids are busy in mobile sets, and they could invest their time in some productive works. Having said that, I firmly believe giving mobile phones to children is completely preposterous. Usage of

cell

phones invites many physical hazards in children. Prolonged usage of

cell

phones

not

negation of a word or group of words

Not

only hampers the

eyesight but

Accept comma addition

eyesight, but

also

deteriorates the postures of kids, in a long run.

Furthermore

, addiction of mobile games tends to make children lazy as it does not require any physical movements. It decreases the enthusiasm to play in

grounds

Suggestion

the grounds

In addition

, while using phones children are completely occupied

as a result

, they do not need

physical presence

Suggestion

the physical presence

of anyone.

This

might result in being aloof from peers, from a very primitive age.

This

, in the long run, invites psychological disorders like depression, lack of social skills and so on. All in all, while some guardians assume it to be

good idea

Suggestion

a good idea

to hand over mobile phones to kids, I

believe

Suggestion

Believe

it does not do any good. The physical hazards like ill maintained postures, poor eyesight; psychological disorders like loneliness and depression are the results of using

cell

phones.

Thus

, giving

cell

phones to children should be discouraged to avoid catastrophic repercussions.

Submitted by sukirti.dhakal on Thu Oct 17 2019

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

317 words

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Supported main points

Accurate linking words

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Lexical resource: 4.0

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Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

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Clear & comprehensive ideas

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Some parents think it is good to give their children mobile phones while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

People believe that Generation Z (1997-2007) are more dishonest than previous generations. What is the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

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The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider, the rich more richer, the poor even more poorer. What problems can the situation cause and give the solutions?

some people believe that studying at university or college is the best rout to a successful career, while other believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays people make new friends through social networks and internet chat groups. Some people think this is good. Others think face-to-face interaction is essential. Discuss both views and give your opinion.