Today more people are opting for cosmetic surgeries, hair colouring and other cosmetics. Why is this the case? Do you think this development is positive or negative?

#people #surgeries #hair #cosmetics #case #development

Nowadays, many people are paying a huge amount of money to do plastic surgeries to change their shape to have a good look, particularly,

youth

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young

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people.

This

Unnecessary verb

apply

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mostly have a negative impact on individuals and society as

whole

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a whole

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, and few positive

aspect

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aspects

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apply

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will be considered.

Fundametally

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Fundamentally

, there are a number of predominant factors which

tregged

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trigged

trigger

triggered

this

issue, particularly, celebrity life and efforts of social media.

Firstly

the

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apply

show examples

youngester

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youngsters

are highly affected by their famous actors or singers,

thus

, they always

trying

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try

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lool

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look

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apply

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for instance

, their haircut or clothes or even their facial shape. Thereby, many of them go to cosmetic

clinicsto

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clinics to

clinics

clinic to

do so.

Futhermore

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Furthermore

, the

prencence

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presence

of social media

had

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has

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changed our life and thought toward cosmetic

surgery

. So,

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a friend

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friend

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friends

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always

recommend

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recommends

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each other to do,

for example

, surgical nose edits to look more

beauty

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beautiful

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and handsome,

therefore

this

peer

presure

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pressure

has persuaded many teenagers toward

surgerical

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surgical

clinics.

In addition

, as many

people

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people,

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these days depend

merly

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merely

on fast food, which

affect

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affects

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their healthy and they become

over

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apply

show examples

wights.

As a result

, there are many

advertisingl

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advertising

videos

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Instegram

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Instagram

facebook

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Facebook

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and

twitter

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Twitter

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this

issue,

for example

last

week, I saw one of them

wrote

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write

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a post '

One day

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One-day

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surgery

to change your life from

obasity

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obesity

to health body shape' they posted.

However

, some of

this

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these

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adverts are fake and some of them

don

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show examples

not consider the

subsequences

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consequences

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surgery

on their patient, they only earn money. In conclusion, after a careful analysis of

this

trend, I believe that most of those who went to do cosmetic

surgery

have

regreted

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regretted

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apply

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their

desision

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decision

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after afterwhile

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afterwhile

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a while

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, which

costed

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cost

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them a lot of money.

However

, I think those who have

accident

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an accident

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truma

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trauma

, need

such

surgery

truely

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apply

show examples

Submitted by mediyprint on Tue Oct 22 2019

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task response

Your essay lacks clear and comprehensive ideas and relevant specific examples.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is somewhat developed, but the introduction and conclusion could be clearer and more impactful.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
48Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

289 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Aesthetic enhancement
Cosmetic procedures
Youthful appearance
Social stigma
Celebrity endorsements
Self-esteem
Body image
Cultural norms
Consumer behavior
Psychological well-being
Ethical dilemmas
Media portrayal
Public perception
Non-invasive treatments
Invasive surgeries
Self-image
Plastic surgery
Social identity
Market trends
Personal grooming

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Today more people are opting for cosmetic surgeries, hair colouring and other cosmetics. Why is this the case? Do you think this development is positive or negative?

Your opinion

Some people say that only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

Some people believe that reading stories from a book is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?