People nowadays are not fit and active than the people from the olden days. Discuss the causes for this situation and suggest some possible solutions.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent years, it has been observed that people of
this
Linking Words
age lack
Accept comma addition
age, lack
the strength and
vigor
forceful exertion
vigour
as
people
Suggestion
the people
of old. While the list of causes is endless, there are possible solutions to rescue mankind. One of the causes of
this
Linking Words
situation is the feeding habits of people nowadays. In a world where junk foods have become a norm as against homegrown foods consumed in previous years, people lack the needed nutrients that
comes
Suggestion
come
with completely natural
cuisines
a mechanical damper; absorbs energy of sudden impulses
cushions
.
For instance
Linking Words
, people who work all week barely have
time
Use synonyms
to cook for
themselves but
Accept comma addition
themselves, but
rely on heavily processed foods daily. The chemicals used in processing and preserving these foods adversely affects the human
system thereby
Accept comma addition
system, thereby
reducing
release
Suggestion
the release
of energy. A possible solution includes people making it a priority to eat foods they cooked themselves adhering to nutritional guidelines to ensure the served food contains
the all nutrients
Suggestion
all the nutrients
required for a balanced diet and cutting down on industrially processed foods. Another cause of
this
Linking Words
situation is the reduction in
number
Suggestion
the number
of hours people spend sleeping.
This
Linking Words
is due to the increasing work demands to meet up with pressing responsibilities people are saddled with. An example of
this
Linking Words
is a situation where people work two to three jobs just to be able to cater for their families and
hence
Linking Words
, they barely get four hours of sleep. Their
health
the locus of feelings and intuitions
heart
breaks down and
this
Linking Words
reduces the level of activity over
time
Use synonyms
. To curb
this
Linking Words
, employers should be mandated to ensure that the maximum allowable working hours is cut down to give people more
time
Use synonyms
to rest while ensuring the earn at least enough to cover basic needs. In conclusion, these issues will continue to plague our society until humankind
deliberately take
Suggestion
deliberately takes
steps to ensure that the agility level is increased by cutting down the consumption of processed foods and creating more rest
time
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: